A Scouting Trip
by artemis-nz
Summary: Conrad allows Yuuri to accompany him on a scouting trip. At least, that's what it was meant to be. Conrad/Yuuri.
1. Chapter 1

Yuuri surfaced from the small pool, spluttering. Could he not even take a drink of water without being transported between his two worlds, now? But apparently not, because he was, choking from the suddenness of it all. One moment he was lying in bed, preparing to give into what had been a over-bearing mother's orders, and the next moment he was being half-drowned in a whirlpool. And still in his pyjamas, what's more. He shakily stood and coughed up more water, wishing there was a more dignified way to arrive.

"Heika? Are you alright?"

And now Conrad had clambered into the pool, unmindful of his own clothing being soaked to the knees in the process, when he saw Yuuri clearly in some distress.

"It's… Yuuri", the boy replied between ragged breaths. He allowed Conrad to take him by the shoulder and guide him out of the water. Yuuri was still having trouble breathing in-between his coughing fits, however, and it became apparent to Conrad that Yuuri's sudden dunking was not the only cause.

"You're sick", Wolfram announced helpfully from a few feet away.

"Thanks, I hadn't noticed", Yuuri replied, and covered his mouth with his hand just in time to catch another few coughs. He saw Conrad out of the corner of his eye beckoning to someone, and the next moment Conrad had a horse in hand, and had more or less bodily lifted Yuuri to sit astride it. Conrad was in front of him a second later, already signalling the horse to move forward with never a by-your-leave. He was not in his usual soldier's uniform, Yuuri noticed, but rather dressed in plain, non-descript clothing, and Yuuri reminded himself to ask about it back at the castle. Speaking of which-

"I could've ridden to the castle on my own", said Yuuri, attempting to sound indignant and trying to convince himself of the statement at the same time.

"I think not", Conrad replied, and Yuuri heard a little amusement in his voice overlaying the concern. He gripped Conrad's waist a little tighter as Conrad urged the horse into a swift trot. Wolfram, Gwendal and Gunter followed behind them on horses of their own, letting Conrad lead the group up the hill and towards home.

"So, what's going on? Why have I been called back this time? Dragon attack? Earthquake? A hostage situation?"

"None of those – at least as far as we're aware", Conrad said from in front of him. "Actually, we've really no idea why you were brought here. Shin Makoku is currently as peaceful as we could hope it to be. But Ulrike announced only hours ago that you were coming, and so we met you as usual. "I'm thinking it would have been better had you not been summoned, much as we enjoy your company", he added, hearing Yuuri cough again.

"It's just a cold, really", Yuuri answered. "Does it make a difference whether I have a cold here or a cold back on Earth?"

Conrad had no reply to that, and Yuuri seemed to be recovering a little now; he sat up higher in the saddle, and Conrad, with his trained soldier's hearing, was relieved to find that Yuuri seemed to be breathing a lot more easily.

The group arrived at the castle soon enough, and Yuuri might have gotten away with just Conrad's concern had Gunter not insisted so strongly that his daughter attend to His Majesty. Yuuri gave in with a sigh to Gisela's administrations, knowing that Gunter would be unlikely to leave him alone if he did not consent. The skilled Healer carefully checked Yuuri's pulse and listened to his chest, telling Yuuri to take as deep as breath as he was able. She even checked his eyes – for what, Yuuri wasn't entirely sure. Pronouncing herself satisfied, she allowed Yuuri to get up, with a quiet but firm warning to take it easy for the next few days. Gisela was soft-spoken enough for now, but Yuuri knew not to object; all present in the room had at least once witnessed Gisela when she became stressed or angry, when even the hardiest soldier did not wish to chance drawing her displeasure.

Finally in dry clothes, Yuuri remembered to question Conrad about the clothing. "Why are you dressed like that? Going someplace where you don't want to stand out?"

"Just a precaution. There are still many people around, Demons and Humans alike, who are distrustful of a man in soldier's uniform. It's just a regular scouting trip – nothing exciting, I promise you."

"Great. Then I'm coming along, too." There were simultaneous exclamations of refusal, at that.

"You've only just arrived, Yuuri", Wolfram protested angrily. "You should spend your time doing actual work, not gallivanting around the country-side doing what's only a mere soldier's job!"

"Oh, _Heika!_ You really mustn't, you're sick, you'll come down with a fever, it'll be cold and wet at night and you'll come back even worse than you arrived, I simply can't allow it-"

"I must agree, Heika. You're needed here at the castle, and all I'll be doing is checking to make sure everything is still as it should be."

"Good – it won't be dangerous then, right? Not if you're only scouting the area – it's not as if we'd be going into enemy territory or anything. And it's _Yuuri_, by the way", he added as an afterthought."

"Well, no, but even so, Wolfram and Gunter are still correct; it's no trip for the Maoh to be making."

"Why not? It's a safe enough trip. And it's not like I have anything to do here, is there? You said yourself you don't know why I was summoned here this time. Maybe it's because I'm _supposed _to go with you." There was a stubborn note in his voice that Conrad knew all too well.

"And I expect someone else – namely me - would be doing the paperwork for you?" Gwendal glared at him, and Yuuri squirmed guiltily.

"Well… I could just do it when I get back", Yuuri said. "How long would we be, Conrad?"

"A few days at most, but-"

"You're still not well, Heika!", Gunter moaned. "How could you take so little care of yourself? Oh, so brave, risking your very health for your country's welfare! But I beg you, let Conrad go alone and stay here yourself in order to recuperate fully!"

"I must agree, Yuuri. It's no use telling me you're not sick, and I won't be the one to make it worse."

"And I told you before, it's just a cold! Please, Conrad. It's a great chance for me to get to know the wider area better, and it'll be perfectly safe if you're there. And anyway, I feel just fine now, see?" He stood up straight, praying the tickling sensation in his throat wouldn't make him start coughing again.

"Hm. You were in your pyjamas when you arrived because you were sick and had no doubt been ordered to rest."

"You know what my family's like – I practically get ordered to bed every time I happen to sneeze."

"And did your mother also happen to order you to take the day off from your studies?"

"She did not", Yuuri said triumphantly. He refrained from mentioning that it had been a Sunday back on Earth anyway, and smiled winningly at Conrad. The soldier sighed.

"You will need to pack some warm clothes, since it's possible we'll be making camp outside."

"Lord Weller!" Wolfram looked furious, and Conrad shrugged as Yuuri ran off to change back out of his distinctive black clothing that had been provided for him.

"He _is_ the Maoh, Wolfram. If he wants to come that badly, what's the real harm? I won't let him out of my sight, believe me."

Wolfram continued to splutter angrily as Gwendal turned to Conrad, speaking quietly into his ear. "Stick to that promise, Conrad. I don't have a good feeling about this."

"You never do when it comes to him", Conrad replied, smiling slightly as he saw Gwendal's eye compulsively twitching. "Don't worry – you know I'd protect him with my life, if it came to that."

"Hn." Gwendal didn't deign to reply any more than that, but Conrad knew his older brother trusted him. It was Conrad, after all, who was the most protective out of all of them in a way. He would allow nothing bad to happen to Yuuri, and had meant every word of his reply to Gwendal.

Banishing the darker thoughts from his mind, he smiled at Yuuri as the Maoh made his reappearance, now dressed in much less distinctive clothes of his own. Despite his earlier protestations, Conrad welcomed the trip alone with Yuuri. Other than when they played baseball or ran together in the mornings, precious little time was spent between them in any privacy; there was always some business for the Maoh to attend to. Perhaps this time, Yuuri could relax a little more and be able to 

enjoy his first few days in Shin Makoku without the ever-present burden of paperwork to be done. And perhaps, after all, the fresh air might do him some good-

"Ready?"

"Whenever you are, Yuuri."

The group walked to the stables. And Yuuri smiled that open-hearted smile of his, both because Conrad had called Yuuri by his name and because he had been allowed to escape the usual castle routine, at least for a little while.

"Yuuri! If you get hurt in any way, I'll never forgive you! _Either_ of you!"

"Bye, Wolfram", Yuuri replied, not bothering to argue. "I'll do that paperwork when I get back Gwendal – I promise", Yuuri added, waving.

"Hn. Just be careful," the older man replied gruffly. Gunter could only wring his hands in hopelessness from where he stood beside him.

Gwendal's warning was the last thing Yuuri heard from them as he and Conrad each mounted a horse and rode away from the castle again, and into the morning sunlight.


	2. Chapter 2

It was just after mid-day when Conrad and Yuuri stopped for a break, removing their small packs from the horses and allowing them horses to drink from the stream unhindered. The sun still shone for them, and Yuuri stretched and lay down on the grass, munching on an apple from his pack.

"I thought I'd be a lot sorer than this, but I guess all those horse riding lessons from Wolfram paid off", Yuuri sighed contentedly.

Conrad nodded, studying the Maoh unobtrusively. He hadn't been sure how heard to push Yuuri, but he had been surprised when Yuuri had been able to keep up, seemingly with little effort. He had held the horse well, and any concerns Conrad may have had about him in regards to riding had disappeared.

"You've improved immeasurably since the first time you rode", Conrad agreed, and Yuuri turned his head towards him, hearing laughter in the soldier's voice.

"I couldn't really have gotten any worse", Yuuri grinned, remembering his first ride into Shin Makoku. An eventful one, to say the least. "So, are we supposed to be watching for anything particular?"

"Anything that strikes you as out of the ordinary. We're not deep into the forest area yet, so I don't expect to see anything for a while – if we see anything at all. I don't expect to; Your Majesty would not have been allowed to accompany me so easily had anyone expected any trouble. This scouting trip is made regularly, and usually by lower-ranked soldiers. I volunteered this time; I prefer to keep an eye on things personally. There's been no trouble in recent times in this particular area, but I am always aware that peace can be very fragile. Especially now that we have both Humans and Demons co-existing, and often in areas very close to each other in proximity."

"Did I make more work for you, Conrad?" Yuuri spoke jokingly, but Conrad knew that behind the question was a real seriousness. Yuuri had always hated to make things harder for others, even when there was no choice.

"… In a way", said Conrad carefully. "Things have certainly changed since Your Majesty arrived in Shin Makoku. I believe those changes have been for the better."

"Hmm. What about everyone else? Gwendal always argues with me when I make decisions about the kingdom, and Wolfram still tells me I'm a wimp whenever I try to do things peacefully. He says that sometimes people have to fight, and to let them to it if it's none of our business."

"Ah. I believe Wolfram has a slightly… narrower view of the interactions between Humans and Demons, Heika. But you'd be surprised how much his views have changed over time, too."

"It's _Yuuri_, Conrad. What about Gwendal?"

"Gwenal is… he is a little more complex, I think. Wolfram has always been the one to speak his mind, oftentimes without thinking. Gwendal is the opposite to him in that way – and sometimes he says or does things that are contrary to what he really thinks."

"Why?"

Conrad watched the horses drink, shading his hands against the sun's glare. "Because he likes to satisfy himself that people are unwavering in their motives. He pushes sometimes, just to be sure that people mean what they say and will not stray from their original intentions. And even though you can't tell unless you know him well, he fears war, almost as much as you do."

Yuuri sat up, surprised. "Why?"

"Because he knows it too well", said Conrad simply. He watched Yuuri's dark eyes blink, and knew the Maoh was taking this new information to heart. "I see", he said after a moment. "Thank you, Conrad." Yuuri smiled across at him, radiant, and Conrad saw in his King what so many others often overlooked. He was inexperienced, yes, and sometimes devastatingly naïve – but he was not stupid. Sooner or later, Conrad knew, Yuuri would put his newly-acquired information to good use. Pity the person who mistook this young, still-innocent Maoh for a fool.

"Perhaps we should get going, Yuuri? There's a specific spot I'd like to reach before it begins to get cooler. We're making good time, but just to be sure-"

They re-loaded the hoses, and Yuuri made sure to have another good stretch before he mounted again. He wasn't sore now, but he wouldn't bet on being so pain-free the next morning, and he didn't want to hinder Conrad if he could help it.

"So you never told me what exactly we should be looking out for?" Yuuri asked as they began heading forward once more. "How will I know if something's out of the ordinary?"

"We're far enough away from any town or village now, so we should be on the lookout for anything that seems out of place with the natural landscape", Conrad replied. "Smoke, for example, or any sounds not made by wildlife."

"People aren't allowed around here?"

"They're allowed, to an extent. It is not so uncommon for people to wander through the area – indeed, some often do, especially if they're looking for something particular that is native only to a certain area like this one. Healers may gather plants where they will, and occasionally people pass through the forest on some errand or other. But never in large groups without prior notice; it is forbidden for any group above a certain size in number to wander through unchecked. This is one of the ways in which Shin Makoku may keep an eye on suspicious movements, so that no large enemy force catches Shin Makoku off guard."

Yuuri leaned forward on his horse, interested. "But what if a large force did wander through here, say at night when there isn't anyone around to see them?"

"It is impossible for a force of any real number to pass through without tell-tale signs. Even highly-trained soldiers cannot move silently in large numbers, and they must always stop at some point to eat and rest. And when those soldiers move on, there are always signs left behind if you know what to look for. A whole trail is left behind, even if they take care to bury the fire or sweep the area clean after them."

"I suppose… but then, what if you didn't notice in time?"

"We have men specifically assigned for that purpose. People we trust to spot anything unusual, and who are trained to not get spotted themselves in the process."

"People like Josak?"

Conrad smiled, proud that Yuuri had come to this conclusion so quickly. "Yes. Among others."

They were gradually heading more and more into shaded areas, and suddenly the forest was upon them. Yuuri, who had always travelled by open road and by ship, was amazed at how quickly they were swallowed up by a veritable ocean of green and brown. He glanced at Conrad, who was looking about him as if to find something.

"Conrad? What's up?"

"Just trying to find… ah. Here it is." He pointed at a tree. It seemed no different from any other tree around it, and Yuuri eyed it confusedly.

"That tree right there? I don't see- hey! There's a weird mark right there, scratched into the bark!", he noticed, excited. "Does that mean someone has been here when they shouldn't have?"

"No. I made that mark myself, around this same time last year. It lets me know which path I took."

"But… but there isn't a path, Conrad."

"Ah, but there is. Many, in fact. They are not paths in the way you might think of them, but they are here nonetheless. And this forest is not a small one. Even those who are familiar with the area could easily lose themselves. When it gets darker especially, it's no easy task to remember the direction you came from, let alone which way you're meant to go. Stick close to my side, Yuuri – even in the daytime here, things can go awry."

"I have no intention of wandering, believe me", Yuuri replied, looking around him. He knew that somewhere above the tree-tops, the sun still shone. Yet there were only small patches of light that broke through from above them, and Yuuri's eyes had still not completely adjusted to the dimmer light. Dark shapes surrounded him. Non-threatening, but still utterly unfamiliar; there was no way Yuuri would want to get lost in here. Already he felt he was within a maze, and when he turned around to see if he could see where they had come from, he felt almost a little apprehensive as he saw that, even looking directly down, there was no clear trail to mark where the horses had trodden. If he squinted, he could make out the details. Had it been any darker, it would have been impossible for him to do so. Realising this gave him a new appreciation of people like Conrad or Josak, who could make their way through such challenging terrain.

He felt safe with Conrad riding directly in front of him, though, and there was no way Conrad would let Yuuri lose sight of him. The noises from the horses' hoofs had become a lot more muffled because of the dense foliage and the closeness of their surroundings, but Conrad had slowed his own horse to a walk now, and Yuuri had no problem keeping up with him.

Still, when Conrad stopped suddenly, Yuuri nearly bumped right into his horse. "Conrad, what-"

He became silent as Conrad turned with a finger to his lips, shaking his head. Yuuri walked his horse forward a little so as to be at Conrad's side, and the soldier leaned sideways, mouth directly next to Yuuri's ear.

"Stay very close to me, Heika. I believe we are being followed."


	3. Chapter 3

Yuuri was immediately silent, watching Conrad and trying to see which direction he was looking in. The soldier was tense, listening hard and trying to ignore the sounds that he knew were no threat. The rustles in one direction which attempted to claim his attention was only a bird somewhere close in the undergrowth; he had to pretend that noise did not exist, and concentrate only on the noises that were in some way unnatural.

Yuuri's dark eyes darted and jumped at every sound – unused to the muffled sounds of the forest and completely unfamiliar with the landscape in any sense, every sound became was now automatically a threat. There came a loud rustling near the bushes just out of his line of sight, and he let out a breath he hadn't known he had been holding when he realised it was just another bird, looking at him with beady black eyes as if to demand what business they had in stopping so near his home.

"Just a bird", said Conrad, a little louder than was strictly necessary. But he signalled to Yuuri to follow again as quietly as possible, and Yuuri realised he wanted whoever he believed was following them to think that Conrad had let down his guard.

The wind blew, sudden and chill, and over the noise which allowed him to speak to Yuuri without his voice carrying and being overheard, Conrad said softly, "We'll head towards the river. It means straying from the track we've been following thus far, but once we reach the water we won't need to worry about being approached from our left – the river here runs wide and deep, and the only way across is to swim. It's near-impossible to do because of the swift currents; we'll be safer there."

Yuuri heard the unspoken, "_You'll_ be safer there", but refrained from comment. It had been his own choice to travel with Conrad, and he didn't want to make it any harder on him than things already were. Had Yuuri not been there, he knew Conrad may well have chosen a different approach to the problem. As such, he had already compromised on Yuuri's behalf.

"Any idea who it is that's following us?" he asked instead.

Conrad waited until the wind picked up again before he answered. "No. But whoever this person is, they've done well to follow thus far."

"There's only one of them, then? You're sure?"

"Positive", Conrad answered. "But remember that in here, numbers don't necessarily have the advantage."

The wind died down again as quickly as it had come, and Yuuri didn't speak again lest he give away their location. He sensed that they were changing direction now, little by little rather than all at once, and that Conrad was still listening out as carefully as he could. It would not be Yuuri who would distract Conrad from his concentration.

They reached the river without incident, and without any further noise to indicate that they were being followed at all. This did nothing to ease Conrad's mind; the very fact that he had been sure they were not alone in the forest and that he could no longer hear anything even remotely suspicious now was not a good thing. There was a possibility that they had managed to evade their mystery follower altogether, but Conrad, judging from the skill in which they had been followed to begin with, was not inclined to believe this. Which meant that either the person following them had given up and turned around – again, unlikely – or that the person was watching and waiting for them to reappear. Conrad glanced at Yuuri, still sitting astride his horse and waiting patiently for Conrad to come to a decision. He would trust in whatever choice Conrad would make, the soldier knew. Yuuri had always trusted him. He would not be the cause of that trust being broken.

All his instincts told Conrad not to let Yuuri out of his sight. Common sense told him that it was the only choice to be made. Resolved, Conrad dismounted, nodding at Yuuri to do the same. He knew that nobody would be able to overhear their words over the noise of the rushing water. "Heika, I need to backtrack a little. It would be foolhardy to remain here when we know we're being followed. But I need to go alone. I know you can be quiet, but I can't have any noise give me away if I'm to discover who is behind this. Do you understand?"

Yuuri looked at Conrad, his eyes dark and solemn. So trusting. "I understand", he said, and watched as Conrad tethered both of the horses to a tree.

"I have to leave the horses behind; they're too noisy for me to take with me. With the river at your back and the close density of the trees to either side, there is only one way for anyone to approach you on horseback - the way we came. You need to wait here for me. But if… if, for whatever reason, you need to get away quickly, all Your Majesty needs to do is pull at the base of this tie, just here." He demonstrated, loosening Yuuri's horse from the tree in one easy movement and then re-tying it.

"I see." To Yuuri's credit, his voice was quite steady. "How long do you think you might be?"

"I will be as quick as I possibly can. By nightfall, I _will_ be back."

"And if you aren't?" There was no fear in his voice, but only a matter-of-fact questioning.

"I will be. I swear it. And if anything should happen…" He felt underneath the saddle of his horse, and pulled out the object that had been concealed there, handing it to Yuuri. "Use this."

Yuuri held the dagger in his hands, feeling the cold weight of it that mirrored the coldness creeping upwards through his chest. "I don't want this."

"Please, Heika-"

"I've never hurt anyone before! And I don't know how to use-"

"Point and stab", said Conrad, and watched Yuuri flinch, hating himself for the ruthlessness in his voice. But he would not allow Yuuri to wait for him unarmed, and a dagger would be far easier to use to defend himself with than a sword – a weapon which Yuuri had never been comfortable even carrying, let alone fighting with. "Please take it, Yuuri. For my own peace of mind, even if you never use it. Hold onto it until I return."

Yuuri looked at him again, turning the dagger over and over in his hands. "I won't need to use it. Come back quickly-" He stopped, not wanting to sound afraid.

"I will." Conrad allowed himself to grasp Yuuri on the shoulder, a warm gesture of reassurance against the gradual dimming of the sun. And just like that, he was gone. Yuuri could not even see where Conrad had trodden upon the ground, he had blended into the surroundings so quickly. It was not too late, he knew. If he called out now, asking Conrad to come back, he knew with a certainty that Conrad would do so, and readily abandon the plan if Yuuri so wished. But he wouldn't; he would not refuse to allow Conrad to do what he thought to be best. And if that meant that Yuuri was now already straining his ears and jumping at every sound that could be heard above the river, well, that was the price he preferred to pay. Conrad would come back. He had promised. Conrad had never lied to him.

"Come back soon", he whispered, and leaned against a tree to wait.

He watched the horses flicking their tails every so often, and his eyes flickered in time to catch a fish jump in the water for a split second, scales flashing in the afternoon sun. After a while, when he had seen and heard nothing beyond what could be expected, he simply sat with his head turned in the direction he had seen Conrad leave, ready at any moment to see him reappear – perhaps empty-handed, perhaps not.

The sun sank lower. Yuuri knew this, because even though he could not see it, the temperature dropped noticeably, and the light which filtered through the trees grew dimmer. The horses seemed a little uneasy, pawing at the ground occasionally and tossing their heads. A bird gave a mournful cry somewhere in the distance, and another bird answered. And finally, Yuuri realised that it was very nearly dusk, and that Conrad was still yet to return. The dagger was still in his hand, heavier now that it had seemed to be however long ago now since Conrad had left. His chest felt tight, his breathing restricted. And there were noises that he had not been aware of until very recently.

Rustlings became louder to his ears, and the wind seemed to pick up a little. Yuuri shivered, holding the dagger close to his chest. Unlike Conrad, it was impossible for Yuuri to be sure of which noises were possible threats and which of them were simply the noises of a typical forest night. Dark shapes in front of him slowly became all he could make out from what had been definite normal trees only minutes before. He stood, heart hammering in his chest, so that he felt it vibrating through his entire body. He desperately wanted to cough, to rid himself of the tickling sensation which had somehow made is way down from his throat and into his chest, but he could not quite bear to break the silence in such an obvious way.

And suddenly, there it was. A loud crack to his right, startling him and making him jump. He wouldn't dare call out; hardly dared even breathe too loudly. He could see nothing, but that only meant it was now getting dark enough for him to be more uncertain of his surroundings. Was that a tall bush there, or a shadow of someone watching him? Was that sound the wind through the trees overhead, or was it footsteps just beyond his line of sight? There it was again, another, softer creak. Another tree bowing to the wind, or the sound of leather boots somewhere on the forest floor? If he strained his hearing just a little more, perhaps he could just make it out-

And, without warning, a hand on his shoulder. Yuuri didn't think – he simply turned, his dagger pointed outwards. He heard a ripping of cloth, and then a strong hand locked his into place. "Yuuri, it's me!" Finally, a familiar voice, a familiar face. Safety. And Conrad was safe. Safe, and unharmed, except for-

"Conrad! Oh God, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!"

Conrad looked down at his arm, a little surprised. "It's only a scratch, Heika." A thin cord of red appeared above the skin and torn clothing.

"You told me to point and stab", Yuuri said idiotically and without thinking, and didn't mind when Conrad hugged him tightly to his chest.

"I'm the one who should be apologizing, Heika. Forgive me for leaving you like that; it won't happen again. Had I known it would take so long, I would never have left." There was frustration in his voice; Conrad had come back alone, and without any answers. Relief, however, was what coloured his tone above all. If Yuuri had been hurt in any way… "You point and stab rather well, Heika."

Yuuri gave a short laugh. To hear the beating of Conrad's heart, strong and solid against his own body, gave Yuuri a feeling of security despite his earlier fears. And it felt good to correct Conrad on the usage of his name, yet again. That, at least, was as safe and familiar as anything could be.


	4. Chapter 4

Dinner was a simple affair, but Yuuri realised as soon as he saw the food that Conrad pulled from his pack that he felt starving. Now that the prolonged adrenaline rush from earlier had left him, he found himself wanting only food, and then, promptly, sleep. The dried strips of meat, slightly dried-out bread rolls and another apple were little better than army rations and a far cry from the type of food served at the castle, but Yuuri was content nonetheless. Just to have Conrad back, and back for good, gave Yuuri a feeling almost of elation, despite knowing that whoever it was that Conrad felt threatened by was still out there, somewhere in the night.

"So what now?" Yuuri asked, having eaten his fill. "Are we supposed to keep moving?"

"Now we sleep. Or at least, you sleep. I'll keep watch."

"No way! You need sleep too, Conrad! Besides, should we really be stopping to rest all night if that guy's still around?"

"He has not found us yet, and I know I wasn't followed back after I left to have a look around. If we remain as quiet as we have been, there is only a very slight chance of being discovered where we are when it's so dark. Against that remote chance, however, I should keep watch."

"But aren't you tired, too? Isn't it maybe better to take turns?"

Conrad couldn't help but smile a little at Yuuri's obvious distress. "I thank Your Majesty for your concern. But this is what I am trained to do, and you need the rest more than I. Besides, it won't be so long for me tonight. I'll wake you at first light so we can leave as early as possible."

"But, well… are you sure? It hardly seems fair…" Yuuri was doubtful, but Conrad shook his head.

"It is better that you should get some sleep. It would not do for you to encourage that cold of yours by not resting when necessary."

"I- well, yeah, I suppose. But promise to wake me if you get tired and let me take over, okay?"

"I promise."

"Hmm." Yuuri still didn't seem entirely convinced, but he spread out a rough blanket as a make-shift mattress anyway, and pulled the thick cloak that Conrad handed to him over himself as a blanket. He kicked off his shoes but opted to sleep otherwise fully dressed, already shivering a little and sensing that it would get a lot colder before the night was through. He listened as Conrad walked around the perimeters of their tiny campsite, and watched him sit against the base of a tree when he was done, his legs drawn up for a little added warmth and his sword, unsheathed, resting on his knees. Yuuri had the distinct feeling that, even if Conrad did end up feeling just a little tired, he had no intention of waking Yuuri up to replace him as a guard. The Maoh closed his eyes, deciding that he had better sleep now just in case Conrad did change his mind on that after all.

The noise of the river became something soothing and more distant, and Conrad knew Yuuri had fallen asleep when he saw his body relax completely and heard his breathing become deeper and steadier. Conrad closed his own eyes, although he was far from relaxed. He regularly stood and patrolled the perimeters again, in part to ensure that he could see nothing untoward, and in part to keep himself as alert as possible throughout the night. He often kept his eyes shut in the times between his patrols, knowing that his hearing would now be far more reliable that his eyesight, and would be less distracted if his eyes were not constantly straining to see in the darkness.

Yuuri slept on, and did not wake even when Conrad came to check on him, not liking the sound of his breathing, which came heavy and strained in the earlier hours of the morning. Nonetheless, Conrad could not see anything that would be better for Yuuri than to continue to sleep. He allowed the Maoh to rest an hour longer than originally planned, when he finally shook Yuuri gently by the shoulder.

"Heika. I'm sorry, but you must get up."

"Hnn?" Yuuri blinked, shaking his hair from his eyes and generally looking like he could have used another solid day's sleep. "What's… Conrad, it's late! You said you were going to wake me as soon as it was light!"

Conrad watched Yuuri shoot up from beneath his cloak, alarmed. "No need to panic, Heika. I wouldn't have let you sleep a little longer if I thought it would really change anything. An hour won't make a difference today if we're heading home."

Yuuri stood stock still from where he had been frantically pulling on his shoes. "Home? But… but don't we have to keep on with the scouting mission?"

"We don't _have_ to do anything – I volunteered for this, remember? And under no condition would I allow for you to be in this area any longer than necessary now that we have a very probable danger."

"You said I could accompany you on the scouting trip, and we're not done!"

"This is no longer a scouting trip."

Yuuri glared for a moment, but then sighed. He knew Conrad would do almost anything for him if ordered to, but on this matter, Yuuri also knew that Conrad wouldn't budge. "You're so stubborn, sometimes", he said, and walked the few feet to the river.

"_I'm_ stubborn?" asked Conrad disbelievingly under his breath.

Yuuri didn't hear (and nor was he meant to), as he cupped his hands in the water and splashed some onto his face. It wasn't pleasant, but it had the desired effect; already, Yuuri was feeling a lot more aware. His throat, however, was burning. Quickly cupping his hands again, he drank a mouthful of water, sighing in relief as it soothed the rawness. He stood, ready to go, but hadn't counted on what the liquid would do to his stomach. The freezing water hit him like a kick to the guts. In another moment he was on his knees and shamefully heaving up the meal he had eaten the night before. There was nothing dignified or king-like about it, and his cheeks reddened with embarrassment.

The next minute, he felt Conrad's hands on his shoulders, supporting him while Yuuri emptied the contents of his stomach until all that was left coming up was an acidic and foul-tasting bile which made Yuuri want to gag all the more.

"S-sorry Conrad", Yuuri said, shuddering. "I didn't mean to…"

"Of course not-"

"If Wolfram were here, he'd call me a big wimp."

Conrad's hands moved to smooth the hair from Yuuri's forehead, unobtrusively checking for a temperature while trying to calm Yuuri a little at the same time. "Wolfram is not here", he replied. "And we both know Wolfram often says things in the spur of the moment, even when he knows them to be untrue."

Yuuri sighed, relaxing a little against Conrad's support. "You know you'll probably get yelled at back at the castle for this, even though it's not your fault."

Conrad smiled. "I'm sure I'll survive."

"Wolfram will probably try and beat you up. So might Gwendal, for that matter."

"I would expect nothing less."

"Ugh, I didn't feel this bad last night. Um… Conrad, could you give me a second?"

Conrad nodded, respectfully turning his back and taking a step or two away to give Yuuri his privacy, while the Maoh splashed more water on his face and rinsed out his mouth a little, attempting to rid himself of the taste of vomit still within his mouth. This was _not_ what he had in mind when he had first thought of a simple scouting trip. But at the very least, he could try to clean himself up as much as possible before they moved on. After that, he could try to forget the whole thing ever happened.

"Sorry, Conrad. I'm ready now." Yuuri stood up, feeling a little better, and Conrad tactfully didn't comment further.

"Alright. We'll head back as quickly as possible, to return to the castle tonight. We'll be taking a different route, roughly following the river back along until we reach a certain point. It will take a little longer, but it's safer if we don't take the same route back as we did in coming… just in case."

"And as quietly as possible, right?"

"Yes. Some noise will be unavoidable, but we'll just have to do our best."

They started off again, Conrad confidently leading the way. There was still no real track as far as Yuuri could make out, but it was obvious that Conrad knew exactly where they had to go. He picked a path through the trees assuredly, at first skirting the banks of the river and then moving upwards a little, so that they could still hear the river but no longer see it.

Yuuri kept an ear out for any unusual sounds, but again could not detect anything out of the ordinary. Neither, by the looks of him, could Conrad. On occasion he would call a quiet halt to their progress, and sit silently for a moment or two with eyes closed, listening intently. By the time they stopped for any real length of time to steal a quick meal and rest the horses, the sun had been covered by clouds. It was definitely cooler than yesterday, Yuuri noticed, and realised that it would be getting darker a lot earlier than he first thought because of the weather. Yesterday's quietness had, until later on in the day, been one of tranquillity. Today's silence was filled with all the intensity of a storm, and even the horses seemed to be aware of it. They shivered uneasily sometimes, although not from cold.

"All right, Yuuri?"

Yuuri looked up form where he was finishing his share of the food. "Yeah. Is this the place we start heading back away from the river?"

"That's right. After we're done here, we move up. We'll stick near to the river, but we need to change our direction a little if we're to reach the castle tonight. If we follow the river all the way back, we would end up circling around and probably not reach the castle until tomorrow."

Yuuri remounted his horse gravely. "Lead the way", he said, and Conrad again felt pride for this young king, who was bearing up under the pressure better than anyone might have expected. Not so long ago, he had been a restless and confused boy who lacked even the slightest knowledge about his land and his duties as the Maoh. Now, there was a determination in his eyes that made Conrad wonder when exactly he had missed the point where Yuuri must have suddenly grown into something other than who he had once been. He was certainly not yet fully grown, but it became apparent to Conrad in that moment that he would be doing Yuuri an injustice to think of him as a child.

Conrad led them deeper into the forest, and the rushing of the water gradually became more of a background noise than a focal one. The clouds grew darker overhead, although Conrad, smelling the air, decided that it would not rain until later on in the evening – they should arrive back before then if they kept up their pace, and Yuuri seemed to be doing well with the current speed of travel.

But something, he suddenly realised, didn't seem entirely right. He held up his hand again, signalling another break. Something made him stiffen and look around carefully, listening as intently as he possibly could. There was no sound that he could identify as a threat, yet his instincts were telling him differently, although he could neither see nor hear anything to justify them. He was on the point of continuing on when something – a flash of something other than leaf or bird – caught the corner of his eye. Something was very wrong; he opened his mouth to tell Yuuri to run, but a sharp whooshing sound beat him to it.

It all happened in a single instant, too fast for Conrad to react quickly enough to prevent it. He watched in alarm as Yuuri's horse reared, and he saw that its back had been pierced by some form of small dart; he caught a glimpse of red which tipped the base of it as Yuuri attempted to regain his balance. In pain and panicking, Yuuri's horse did not respond to its rider, and broke into a frightened run. Yuuri, to his credit, kept his seat, but he was not strong enough to pull the animal in.

Yuuri, only just realising what exactly had taken place, looked back at Conrad, already far behind him.

"No!" he heard Conrad yell, and there was a very real fear on his face as he disappeared from Yuuri's view. Head twisted to look behind him as his horse galloped on, he was just able to see a man dressed in black leap out from somewhere in the bushes to stand in front and block Conrad's way.

"_Conrad!_-"

But the wind which tore past him from the sheer speed at which he was travelling tore the words from his mouth. By the time Yuuri's horse, sweating and shuddering, had finally slowed to a walk, Yuuri was utterly alone.


	5. Chapter 5

**I had problems writing this particular chapter - for whatever reason, it just seemed a lot harder to write than the others, so I apologise if doesn't seem to flow quite as well as it should.**

* * *

_Conrad's first instinct was to ride straight after Yuuri, and to hell with this black-clad man who stood in his way. Fighting could come later – Yuuri came first. But the man would not let him pass, and he drew his sword with a knowing smirk._

"_Ready?", he asked, and Conrad had no choice, because the man's sword was already in the air and swinging towards him at a speed which told Conrad that this man was not interested in wounding Conrad, nor capturing him. All or nothing._

_Conrad leapt from his horse, pushing the creature away from him so that it would not get in the way. He had no time to do anything else; he could only trust the horse to remain somewhere close by while Conrad dealt with this threat. Two swords clashed against each other, each playing to win. Conrad's arm was stronger, and he felt the sword against his give way._

"_Aren't you going to ask me who I am?" said the man, taunting. He was smiling._

"_Dead men tell no lies", Conrad replied shortly, and tightened his grip on his weapon. This was no time to be playing games; he would not allow this person to keep him from Yuuri any longer than necessary._

_His opponent was good, but not as good. Minutes passed; his foe grew tired, his arm movements slower, the force behind them weaker. And he knew it, because he stopped and lowered his sword, jumping out of the way of Conrad's own sword just in time. He was clearly outclassed, but he didn't seem to care. Instead, he put his head to one side, as if considering something, and then grinned. _

"_I wonder – which of us do you suppose will find your precious Heika first?" he asked, looking up at the sky expectantly. _

_The sun came out then, for the first time that day, and blinded Conrad with its glare. By the time Conrad could see again, though it was barely two seconds later, it had gone utterly silent. The man was gone, slipping away just as deceptively as he had arrived. _

* * *

Yuuri shakily dismounted from his horse. Its legs were shaking and its eyes rolled, and Yuuri didn't know what the dart that he had finally managed to pull out from its side had been designed for. Some kind of drug; that was obvious. But with his horse either going to sleep or in the process of dying because of it, Yuuri didn't know. He tried to keep calm as he watched the animal totter from side to side, and then finally half-lie, half-fall on the ground of the forest floor.

"Conrad, what should I do?" he whispered out loud. The horse had been his last link to anything that spoke to him of safety – whether the horse was merely sleeping or on its death-bed made no difference to Yuuri's current dilemma: it was plain that he could not remain where he was, in such clear view. For the man in black was not after Conrad, Yuuri knew. Had he been after the soldier, it wouldn't have made any sense to use those darts in the first place. Yuuri, after all, was no fighter, and had the man wished to challenge Conrad, he could simply have done so in the first place. Instead, he had purposefully separated one from the other – knowing, perhaps, that Yuuri had no knowledge of these woods, and no way to get back safely home without Conrad guiding him there.

So. He had to hide, then. But he also had to find Conrad, or else make sure that Conrad found him. Yuuri wracked his brains, trying to think of the best option. The only real advice he had ever heard about being lost in an area such as this was to stay where you were and wait for help. But surely whoever had made that up hadn't had some kind of mysterious assassin hunting them down at the same time. No; whatever he did, he couldn't stay. The horse, lying twitching on the ground, was a dead giveaway as to his location.

He could go back. Go and find Conrad on his own, and then… but he knew he couldn't; knew that, if Conrad was still fighting, the last thing he would want would be Yuuri there in the thick of it, distracting him. The protection of the Maoh would then become Conrad's top priority, rather than his own survival. Yuuri couldn't face that, no matter how very easy it would have been to make the decision to go back – not when he had made Conrad compromise for his sake already. Looking back in the direction they had came, Yuuri realised that he was not even certain of the way back, and knew that he would do Conrad no favours by getting more lost than he already was.

Stick to the river? That was another survival tip he's heard somewhere, and it could be useful. Getting himself hopelessly lost, which he would almost certainly end up doing if he strayed any more deeply into the forest, would do neither him nor Conrad any good. And Conrad himself had said it; the river eventually made its way around back to the castle, which meant following it would at least not lead him in the wrong direction. The horse hadn't stuck near the river during its desperate flight, but Yuuri was sure he could find the river again, although he could no longer even hear it.

Wearily, shivering at the chill in the air and holding back his feeling of helplessness and guilt at leaving the horse to its fate, he stared back at the way he had come, not liking any of the options presented to him. But surely if he found the river then at least he could gain his bearings; surely Conrad would find him. His mind treacherously asked him what would happen if he were to remain unfound, and if he would survive the night without Conrad by his side and a hunter somewhere in the woods. But that was a thought that would do him no good, and he stubbornly pushed it aside before it made him panic. He had trouble enough breathing as it was, because his throat somehow seemed blocked, and getting enough air in was already a struggle.

"Keep it together, Yuuri", he said to himself, trying to stop his shivering. "Panicking never helped anyone…"

He remembered to retrieve his pack from the horse, which held only some spare clothing, a little food, and the knife Conrad had given him. He took that knife out now, and tucked it into his belt without looking at it. He gave the horse a stroke on the neck, fearing that this would be his final goodbye. It lay still now, and was quiet other than its heavy breathing. Yuuri hoped that, whatever happened to it, it would at least die without pain.

Shouldering his pack, he began to walk, and refused to let himself look back in case he changed his mind. As long as he could get the sound of rushing water back within earshot, he told himself he would be safe enough.

When Yuuri's shivering returned and he could no longer stop his body from convulsing, he sang, very quietly, under his breath. The need for silence was apparent, but without being able to focus on something else other than the dreadful isolation that crept up on him with each slow minute that passed, he wasn't sure how long he would be able to force himself to walk for. What he really wanted to do was run – run back the way he had come, back to Conrad. If he couldn't do that, he would have settled for running in any direction, simply to mirror the way his heart raced and make him feel like he was doing something to placate the urgency he felt; an urgency which was fast becoming almost unbearable in strength. So he felt like an idiot, and like every bit a wimp as Wolfram had always said he was, but he sang anyway, choking sometimes on the words because of his throat. Nursery rhymes he remembered from his childhood, a couple of English songs with words he didn't really understand the meaning of - even, at one point when he could not think of nothing else - a Christmas carol. Anything to keep his mind at bay, and to fight against the darkness which would inevitably come. He didn't want to think about what he would do if the darkness did come, and found him without Conrad by his side again. He knew that he would not be able to keep walking if darkness found him alone.

But his thumping heart and dark clouds above told him, more loudly than he dared sing, that he _was_ alone; the most alone he'd ever been in his life. By the time Yuuri realised that the sun was going down, he had stopped singing because he no longer had the courage necessary to do so. Singing had been an act almost of rebellion because of the very fact that people did _not_ sing when they were alone and frightened. Now that the unthinkable was occurring and darkness was actually approaching (_Conrad, please find me!_), the very idea of rebelling against that only made him more afraid. Although he was still only walking, his breath now came in gasps. He tried to stifle them as much as he could, and wondered if perhaps the singing, quiet as it had been, had made his throat worse.

Yuuri began to count his steps instead, silently in his head. He would count, he decided, until it was dark, or until he reached the river – whichever came first. And if Conrad hadn't found him by then, and if nothing else had happened, then he… he would… the thought eluded him. He didn't know what he would do. But whatever it was, he would try not to panic. Panic never helped anyone, neither did crying, he mustn't panic, his chest was on fire from the lack of air-

And there it was. Right in front of him, like some kind of miracle. A tree, with a mark cut into one of the thick, solid branches, nearly identical to the mark he had pointed out to Yuuri on the first day. Yuuri put his hand over his mouth to refrain from sobbing in relief. Conrad had been here. Not recently, but the mark was Conrad's, and he needed no more assurance than that. And the tree, as if reaffirming this fact, whispered to him in the wind like it was saying his name (_Yuuri!_), and Yuuri knew that he would be able to climb the tree, and perhaps find a little courage if he was hidden within the leaves.

The climb up was more difficult than he had anticipated, and his breathing came only a little more easily, but he had only slightly torn trousers and a bloody knee by the time he felt he had climbed high enough – and, he thought to himself as optimistically as possible, if he came out of tonight with only a bloody knee to show for it, then he would be more fortunate than anyone could have hoped.

Yuuri kept his pack securely fastened behind him, checked that his knife was still in place, and peered out through the leaves. The tree was not high enough so that he had a good view of the whole forest around him, but he was sure he'd be able to spot anyone walking close around him without being spotted himself. His arms and legs hurt, and were shaking slightly from the exertion. Perhaps he really as sick, if only this small amount of exercise had made him so very tired…

But he was safe, for now. And now that he was up there, he could suddenly hear the river; loud enough, in fact, that he didn't know how he had missed it. He had been too busy simply attempting to breathe, perhaps… but in any case, it was a good sign. Conrad would find him here for sure.

Nodding to himself as if to make this fact a little more convincing, he settled down as comfortably as he could against the branches and began to wait.


	6. Chapter 6

Yuuri awoke with a jerk, sure that someone had called out his name.

He didn't remember at what point he'd fallen asleep, but when he opened his eyes again it was properly dark – he could just see the moon through the thick layers of leaves above him. Listening, he could hear nothing now but the rushing of the river in the distance and his own beating heart. Perhaps it had been a dream; wishful thinking on his part that Conrad had found him, and that they were both safe and could head for home. But there was not even a lone footstep that he could hear now – nothing to tell him that Conrad had ever passed by or was even anywhere nearby. And it was freezing; cold enough that small clouds of mist rose in front of him whenever he exhaled.

His legs, which had supported most of his body weight until now, were protesting at the treatment. He became aware also that his back had been scratched by the branches at he had been leaning aginst even through the pack he still wore, and that his throat had gotten no better. As soon as his brain - still fuzzy from sleep - had registered this, Yuuri knew that he desperately needed a drink, and soon; before the sound of that water drove him mad. Although getting a drink meant that he would have to scramble back down from the tree, follow the sounds of the river to the water's edge, and then find his way back again to the tree in the darkness.

His throat, raw and burning, decided for him. With numb hands and tingling feet, he began to make his way back down to the ground, and was half-way there when he froze, silent. He had _definitely_ heard something, even if he hadn't seen it. Although past experience had told him that he himself was not able to distinguish between natural forest or animal sounds and human-made noises, he just _knew_ that this time he had not been mistaken. There was someone around – perhaps not very close, but not far away either.

The noise came again, somewhere to his right. He peered around in the inky blackness, still not moving from the lower branch which he now clung to, afraid to move in case he accidentally made a noise himself or was seen by whoever it was that was nearby. With all his heart he wanted to yell out, but he told himself that there could be nothing more foolish than this; he would give away his position in an instant if he called out now, and if the person wasn't Conrad… well, Yuuri was certain he would not be able to run far; not in the condition that he now found himself in.

Yuuri's lower body demanded that he move; the position he had so abruptly frozen in was not a comfortable one, and he was in no way ready to fight or run if he was found where he now was. He needed to move, and quickly; either climb back up the tree and risk making a noise loud enough to lead to his discovery, or climb the rest of the way down and risk being seen more easily on the ground.

_Ground_, he decided. He could run then, at least, and there would be no place to escape if he was seen up in the tree. As quietly as he possibly could, Yuuri inched himself off the branch and down to the ground. His feet found solid, flat earth, and he had heard no further sound to indicate that he was now in pursuit. Undetected then - for the moment, at least. And still he could see nothing; the darkness seemed impenetrable.

The slightest of movements caught his eye. It had been just a tiny glimpse, and then only a glimpse of a shadow against a larger shadow, but he had seen it nonetheless. There was someone there, and they hadn't seen him – but he had seen _them_. An idea was forming in Yuuri's mind now, and he absently fingered the knife that was still within his belt. At any other time, with Yuuri physically well and thinking clearly, the idea would have seemed unwise at best. In the heat of the moment, however, Yuuri grasped onto that idea as it grew and blossomed. Whoever it was that wandered around mere feet in front of him had neither seen nor heard Yuuri behind him – but Yuuri _had_ heard and seen him, and even had a weapon to defend himself with.

That Yuuri's opponent was also very likely armed with at least one weapon and was trained in how to use it did not occur to Yuuri; nor did Yuuri spare thought to consider the fact that his opponent would be probably faster and certainly stronger than he. But the idea appealed to Yuuri: sneak up on whoever it was, hold the knife up to his neck, and then demand to know where Conrad was. If it happened to be Conrad himself, well, then all the better. And if it was indeed the man who had been following them all this time, then he would lead him to Conrad. Of course Yuuri would not even entertain the thought of actually hurting anyone with the knife – but his opponent wouldn't actually know that, and Yuuri was sure he could be convincing enough. Yes – an excellent plan.

It was a testament to Yuuri's current state of mind that these thoughts sounded plausible, even within his own head. Looking back in later days, these thoughts would seem like some sort of strange dream, and certainly not something that Yuuri would ever have considered had he been thinking clearly. At this particular moment, however, Yuuri became utterly convinced that this was the right thing to do.

He slid the knife from his belt and crept forward, craning his head and straining to see from around the base of the tree. It seemed almost darker now that he was on the ground again instead of higher up, and he knew he could not afford to mistake the real location of his target.

He saw the shadow move again, and there was no going back now; his heart was hammering painfully so that he actually felt his chest constrict, suffocating him. But time ticked by and suddenly he was a mere two steps away, the knife raised up and ready to dart out around the man's neck. He was ready, just one more second before-

He must have inhaled too loudly as he prepared to strike, because the next thing he was aware of was the man turning in a flash, naked fury on his face as he grabbed Yuuri bruisingly by the shoulders thrust him backwards. Yuuri's back was rammed up against a tree behind him, and it had all happened so quickly that Yuuri had not even had a chance to make a sound other than a pained gasp as his breath was forcefully expelled from his chest in a rush, winding him. The knife dropped uselessly from his hand.

"_Heika!_"

Yuuri almost fainted with relief. It had been Conrad, all along. He slid to the ground as soon as Conrad released him, his legs turned to jelly.

"Heika, what could have possibly possessed you!-"

"Oh god… oh god, I thought you were… I'm sorry Conrad, I'm such an idiot, I thought for a second… are you okay?"

"Am _I_ okay?!"

At any other moment, the situation would have been humorous. Now, it was all Yuuri could do to curl up then and there and wish for the ground to swallow him whole, so as not to look at Conrad who must have thought Yuuri had had been such a fool-

Yuuri was abruptly enveloped in Conrad's arms. He was alarmed to find that they were shaking. "Conrad, you're… you're shivering! Are you-"

"I'm fine, Heika. But for a while, I thought perhaps… but no matter. I should have had more faith than that. I'm just relieved to see you safe…" And perhaps it was Yuuri's head which was messing with his perception of time, but it felt like Conrad held him for a while longer, and did not stop shaking until he stood again. Yuuri allowed himself to close his eyes for a moment and breathe in Conrad's scent. It relaxed him a little, and was somehow an antidote for his wildly-beating heart.

Conrad eventually widened the gap between them, gazing at Yuuri as if to assure himself that he was real. "Forgive me, Heika. I cannot apologise enough for what has transpired here."

"It's not your fault-"

"It is. If I had been more careful, more swift in reacting, this situation may have been avoided entirely."

"Well I'm the Maoh, and I say it's not your fault. That's my final judgement on the matter." He watched Conrad struggle with himself, attempting to bring his guilt back under control. After a moment, it seemed he succeeded – at least for the present – for he stood up and then reached down to pull Yuuri up in one fluid movement, the knife Yuuri had dropped now in his other hand.

"Your Majesty is too kind", he said, his voice back to the easy and assured tone that Yuuri was more used to. "And now, we need to go. I'll take you back to the horse, and we will ride immediately back home. I'm confident we can still reach Blood Pledge castle tonight." He began to lead Yuuri back through the forest as easily as if it had been broad daylight.

"Conrad… my horse?-"

"Dead. I'm sorry, Heika, but there was nothing I could do. He was dead when I found him."

"I see." Yuuri made his voice remain as firm as he could. "And our assailant?"

"I've neither seen nor heard any sign from him. And I hope it remains so. There is time to deal with such people later."

"Maybe we actually lost him."

Although Conrad's face did not change, his voice was tight with rage when he spoke next. "For his sake, he should pray we have. He will not be forgiven for this."

Yuuri changed the subject. "How far away are we from your horse?"

"Not far - just beyond these trees here. I opted for speed over silence for a time; I could not even conceive of the possibility of our attacker finding you before I could."

"I'm sorry, Conrad. You said it was your fault, but it wasn't… it was mine. I should have done better."

Conrad shook his head, and his hand was a patch of warmth on Yuuri's shoulder. "Not so. You did very well; better than anyone had any right to expect from you, in fact."

"Except for that last part."

"Yes, well…" Yuuri could have sworn he saw Conrad's lips twitch upwards, before he spoke quite gravely, "We all make mistakes."

It was certainly not the time for laughter yet, but Yuuri could not help but be relieved and even cheerful as the tension began to lessen. It left him feeling exhausted, but he couldn't bring himself to mind. They were going home. He was going home with Conrad. All was suddenly very right with the world.

A tiny clearing came into view. The horse was now tethered to a tree by the river; Yuuri heard it snorting in relief, tossing its head as though it too was eager to finally be home and safe. And _warm_. He would not complain now that they were finally ending the journey's end, but now that the adrenalin was once again dissipating, his shivering seemed to have returned in full force. He knew Conrad was concerned, but there was not much that could be done. Yuuri knew Conrad would get them back to the castle as quickly as was humanely possible; he could not ask for more than that.

It was, then, with great anticipation that he and Conrad trod the final few feet to the river's edge.

"Going somewhere?"

Conrad whipped around, his sword already appearing as if by magic in his hands, ready to defend Yuuri to the death if necessary. "Get on the horse, Yuuri."

"I wouldn't. Not if I were you."

The man in black approached from out of the shadows so that Conrad could see him. He held out his hand slightly, so that both Conrad and Yuuri could see that he held some kind of narrow wooden tube. A kind of blow dart, Yuuri realised. His voice was playful, taunting.

"If the Maoh gets on that horse, I won't hesitate to use this. And I'm a little cold, so… my aim might be a little off. It would be a shame if I hit the Maoh with one of these darts by mistake, now wouldn't it?"

Conrad did not hesitate – not even for a single moment. He rushed at the attacker soundlessly, and in a split second hand used not his sword, but instead Yuuri's knife, gone unnoticed by the attacker before now, to cut the wooden tube clean in half. Had his nameless opponent not retracted his arm in the nick of time, Yuuri was certain that he would have also lost a hand.

The man's eyes widened; clearly he had no expected Conrad to react so quickly, and had instead predicted that Conrad would attempt to negotiate, or act as some kind of distraction to allow Yuuri to escape. He took a rapid step back, drawing his sword, and his eyes darted around furtively.

Conrad raised his own sword in the ready position. "But for the compassion of the very Maoh you've just threatened to kill, you would have already lost your head; I would not have been so kind. But I know Yuuri would demand that I give you a second chance. Will you take it, or shall I kill you here and now?"

The man snarled in response and made a run for it. Not away from them and into the trees as Conrad would have guessed, but rather straight towards them. With a speed and agility that no doubt made up for his lack of strength in comparison to Conrad's, he managed to dodge a killing stroke from the soldier's sword. It sliced into his arm and made him drop his own sword, but the man did not stop. Yuuri, too slow to get out of the way completely, was caught off balance as his opponent charged him.

There was no pain as Yuuri braced himself for the inevitable fall. He heard rather than saw Conrad running towards him, screaming something Yuuri couldn't quite catch as he flew though the air. He did not understand at first why Conrad sounded so distressed; it was not as if his assailant had actually really managed to hurt him, after all. But as he landed and did not hit the hard earth that Yuuri had been expecting, he finally understood.

The impact of the water and then the freezing temperature enveloped Yuuri as he was thrown into the river.


	7. Chapter 7

The air was expelled all at once from Yuuri's lungs in a rush, sending bubbles spiralling madly up to the surface.

Yuuri thought, at first, that he was being sucked back to Earth in a whirlpool, but realised instantly after this thought that the sensation was altogether different. Being sucked backwards and forwards between two worlds was certainly never a gentle or particularly pleasant experience, but it had never really _hurt_. His throat had been burning for most of the day, but Yuuri had never had cause to feel that his actual lungs were burning before. They burnt now, screaming at him for air as the currents of the river battered him about. His head cracked into something hard – Yuuri felt sure that, had he not already been enveloped by water, his eyes would be tearing up from the contact. He couldn't tell if he was bleeding or not, but it didn't seem to matter either way. Nothing mattered at this moment except being able to _breathe_-

His head finally broke the surface. Air; just as cold and, in its own unique way just as burning as the water had been, but it was air nonetheless. He gulped it in gratefully before the river pulled him down again – but at least he could actually think for a few seconds now that his survival wasn't in immediate threat. He reached out with his arms, grabbing with his hands whatever came into contact. Weeds from the side of the bank simply ripped in his grasp and were useless, but on his third try his hands clenched around something solid. Yuuri clung on as if his life depended on it, and managed to pull himself up so that his whole face and neck were out of the water.

Only then did he become aware of Conrad shouting again. Yuuri couldn't hear what it was, because the roar of the water – so much louder when he was actually _in_ the water as opposed to when he had been listening from beside it – drowned out the words. But certainly the tone of Conrad's voice was unmistakable.

"_I'm fine!_" Yuuri screamed back just as loudly as he could, hoping that Conrad could at least hear him. "_Just do what you need to!_" Yelling out like that took quite an effort, in part at least because Yuuri kept bobbing up and down in the water, and had to hold himself up with the strength in his arms long enough to get all the words out in one go.

Conrad must have been at least slightly reassured, however, as he heard him yell something else, this time seemingly not directed at Yuuri. The Maoh couldn't see what was going on; there was too much spray from the river because of the pressure of the water against his own body, and the spray kept getting in his eyes whenever he opened them for long enough. Squinting, he saw Conrad facing his attacker, and then caught a glimpse of the attacker falling to his knees, although Yuuri hadn't seen Conrad actually strike him with his sword. Then Yuuri was under the water again after one of his hands slipped a little. He had the presence of mind to kick off his shoes in order to make himself a little lighter. It seemed to work, because a moment later he bobbed back up the surface, just in time to see Conrad bending down to help him out of the river.

Yuuri quickly grabbed onto the hand that reached for his, not giving himself time to think about what would happen if he slipped from Conrad's grasp. Even if he had given himself time to worry about it, he needn't have been concerned; Conrad's grip was as steady and solid as anything Yuuri had ever felt, and he felt safer at that moment than he had all day, even with half of his body still underwater. He managed to smile at Conrad reassuringly through chattering teeth as he was pulled from the river entirely.

"T-thanks, C-Conrad…"

"Are you injured at all, Heika? Any cuts, bruises?" Conrad was unable to keep the concern from his voice, especially when he caught sight of a little blood trickling from Yuuri's mouth. Yuuri had to convince Conrad that it was nothing serious at all, and that he had only bitten his tongue at some point during his submerged struggle.

"It's n-nothing, I'm fine. Just a bit c-cold is all…" He refrained from mentioning where he had hit his head on something in the river, deciding that he had already given Conrad enough to worry about. "And c-call me Yuuri", he remembered to say, as Conrad checked him over. Yuuri's black hair covered most of his bruise – at least, Yuuri was sure that was all it was – and in the darkness, it was easily overlooked. If there was blood, Conrad didn't seem to notice and finally appeared satisfied. He then immediately moved to remove his own cloak and drape it around Yuuri protectively.

"W-what about you?"

"I'll be fine. You need it more than I, and I'm more used to these conditions in any case."

Yuuri pulled the cloak tightly against himself gratefully. The cloak was now the only dry item of clothing he currently possessed, his backpack having been lost to the river. He was very aware that he did not look in the least king-like, with his dark hair plastered to his face, his feet bare and the cloak pooling at the ground because of the height difference between himself and Conrad. He would really have to do something about that, he decided ruefully. With an effort, he pulled himself together and managed to stand up straight, controlling his shivering.

"What happened to the attacker? Did you…?"

Conrad shook his head, knowing the question that Yuuri couldn't bring himself to ask outright. "I did not. He's dead, but not by my hand."

Yuuri looked beyond where Conrad stood, and saw a dark shape lying supine on the grass. Steeling himself and walking over, he glanced at the body and then quickly looked away again. Even in the shadows, he could see that there was a lot of blood. "He killed himself?"

"Yes."

"Why didn't he just run?" There was a slight tremble in his tone that Yuuri couldn't quite hide, and Conrad suspected that the source of it was not the cold. There was no real easy or gentle way in which to tell the truth. "Probably because he had sworn to complete his mission or die in the attempt. Having already failed twice, he knew he would not have gotten another chance."

"He still could've run though, right? It's no reason to kill yourself for…"

"He was a fanatic, Heika. A life which consists of swearing allegiance to a master and carrying out whatever orders one is given. Their life is forfeit should they fail to successfully carry those orders out." He saw Yuuri shiver again, and knew that the questions, however important, had to be put aside for now. "We must go, Heika. We need to get back, and as quickly as possible."

"No! I mean… not yet." Yuuri knelt beside the body and made himself look at the dead man again. He tried to ignore the blood, instead choosing to focus purely on the face. Yuuri realised as soon as he did that the man could barely be called such; he looked only a little older than Yuuri himself did, in fact. His eyes were still open, and they looked blankly up at the sky.

"Why would someone so young choose to do this?" he asked softly. "He had his whole life ahead of him."

Conrad laid a hand on Yuuri's shoulder. He had been surprised at first at the force of Yuuri's determination to remain a while longer; yet, when he considered the decision, he knew that it was really just like Yuuri to care so deeply about the life of another, even when that life had been one of violence. "He would have been paid for his services, Heika", Conrad replied as gently as he could. "Or more likely, his family would have been. A man only chooses such a job when he has either nothing to lose, or everything." He spoke from experience, and memories flashed briefly within his mind. "I believe it would have been the latter."

"Then he was an honourable man", Yuuri decided out loud. "Even if he made some bad choices, he did what he thought was best for those he loved." Steeling himself once again, Yuuri reached out, his hand shaking slightly despite his best efforts, and closed the man's eyes. Conrad, out of respect for Yuuri's actions, kept silent. His hand remained on Yuuri's shoulder in quiet support, while Yuuri closed his own eyes for a moment. He didn't know if there was any such thing as a soul which lingered around the body directly after a death, but he wanted to believe that it did. So in his mind, he told the man's spirit that he forgave him for whatever mistakes he had made, and wished him peace now that his journey was over. Yuuri was still for a minute then, praying to he didn't know quite who, asking to keep the man's family safe, whoever and wherever they were.

He didn't know how long he knelt in the dirt by the man's side, but when he opened his eyes again it had begun, very softly and quietly, to rain. Looking at his face now, the man lying beside him could have been asleep.

"Heika." The Maoh didn't move – he stared down at the body still, seemingly lost in thought. "Yuuri."

"Hm?" Yuuri looked up at the sound of his own name, and Conrad saw that Yuuri looked a little teary-eyed, although Yuuri himself hadn't even seemed to notice.

"We really must go now. But I think… I think that whoever this man was, he would have been grateful to have someone that cared enough to give his passing some kind of meaning."

Yuuri nodded, smiling thankfully at Conrad for understanding. Someone like Wolfram or even Gwendal, he thought, would have been impatient with him and simply would not have understood why Yuuri felt as he did for someone he didn't even know; who, only minutes ago, had tried to kill him. But Conrad knew exactly why Yuuri had acted as he did, and had ultimately given Yuuri the acceptance and support for it that Yuuri had needed.

It was this moment of realisation more than anything else which created a lump in Yuuri's throat that made him not trust his own voice for the time being. So he wordlessly allowed Conrad to help him up from the cold ground, and refrained from speaking as Conrad settled Yuuri as comfortably as he was able atop the horse. Conrad got up in front of him and, taking his cue from Yuuri, set off for home without comment.

He would investigate the matter of the attempted assassination properly once there was time. Someone else he trusted enough to do the job would be able to return to this place and carry out what Conrad had not been able to do himself. A full examination of the body may have been able to reveal further information about who the assassin was or from where he had been sent; the colour of his hair and eyes, the exact tone of his skin, the type of clothing he wore, any identifying marks on his body… all of this would be taken into account later on, and the right people would be informed. Perhaps Josak…

But for now, Conrad trained his thoughts fully on getting Yuuri home, and as quickly as possible. Time enough later for the darker and more complex side of the matter to be investigated. Yuuri would come first.


	8. Chapter 8

**Apologies to the readers, but the next update may be longer in coming than usual - possibly two weeks or so away, due to University assignments. I wrote this chapter fairly quickly because of that, but in terms of the story it's possibly been my favourite chapter thus far - so I hope that everyone enjoys reading it as much as I enjoyed the writing of it. Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to write reviews! I will post up the next chapter as soon as I can.**

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Yuuri could not help shivering at first, even with Conrad in front of him and taking the worst of the cold air himself. The woods seemed as impenetrable as ever, yet Conrad appeared to have no trouble leading the horse steadily along some unseen path. He rode as fast as he dared, knowing that the sooner Yuuri could get dry and warm again, the better. Still, he could only safely guide the horse through the trees in the darkness at such a speed, and at some points - when the trees grew thickly and closely together - he was obliged to slow their pace to a walk.

Yuuri, for his part, kept quiet. Guilt spoke to him, saying that he had caused only trouble for Conrad thus far and that he had just better make sure not to cause anymore. In part, however, Yuuri didn't want to speak lest he hear his voice tremble. He wanted to be strong for Conrad, and was all too aware that Conrad would only meet Yuuri's distress with more concern. He therefore decided that if he could not speak without revealing his weakness, then he would be better not speaking at all. He was absolutely determined above all to survive the trip back to the castle without doing anything embarrassing such as fainting on the way, and so made up his mind to at least appear as steady and unflinching as possible, even if he did not feel it.

He found that, as long as he kept his mind firmly on the task, he could forcibly will his body to stop shivering for short periods of time. To keep his mind occupied, Yuuri made a slight game of the task, and counted in his head the seconds he managed to keep his body completely steady. He seemed to get better at this as he went along; with each time he applied himself to the purpose, he was able to remain steady for longer and longer periods. After a while, Yuuri found that he had stopped shivering altogether even when he was no longer trying, and decided that this could only be a good thing. In truth, his body had simply become too numb to register in Yuuri's mind that it was cold.

He wasn't sure how much time had gone by – he watched the landscape and saw the woods eventually become a little less dense, and realised that the horse was now travelling faster. He tightened his grip around Conrad's waist. Perhaps Conrad noticed this, because the soldier twisted about in the saddle for a moment so that Yuuri could see his face.

"All right?" he asked. Even in the darkness, Yuuri could tell that Conrad's eyes were full of worry as they searched his face – for what, Yuuri didn't know. He didn't reply, but nodded and tried to smile reassuringly. _Don't worry_, he wanted to communicate. He mustn't have done very well, because Conrad did not look reassured in the least. He urged the horse on a little faster, in fact, and Yuuri went back to watching the passing landscape again, wondering exactly how far they were from home but unwilling to ask.

"Not too long, now", said Conrad from in front of him, as if he had read Yuuri's mind. "Stay with me, Yuuri."

_He used my name_, Yuuri thought. It made him all the more determined to make it back safely and fully aware. He still had no real idea of how much time had passed or how much distance they had already covered, but he did notice that it seemed to be getting windier. Yuuri realised that it must be because the trees were thinning out significantly, which meant that they should soon be out in the clear again now that they were nearing the edge of the forest. Sure enough, it wasn't long after this (at least, Yuuri didn't _think_ it was long after this, because it was hard to tell with his mind still playing tricks on him), that they broke out from underneath the cover of the trees completely.

Once they were fully clear of the forest it seemed suddenly a lot lighter. There were stars, Yuuri saw, and a tiny sliver of moon above him. It was the first time Yuuri had been able to see a clear view of the sky since they had left the castle.

Conrad looked back at Yuuri again. "Hold on tight", he said. "Now that we're clear of the woods, we can make better speed."

"What about the horse?" Yuuri asked, breaking his silence.

Conrad frowned at the hoarseness of Yuuri's voice. "He should be alright – he's fit, and had rest enough while walking to be able to make the rest of the way home quickly. See, watch how he lifts his head."

Yuuri wondered if Conrad was trying to distract him from the cold, but didn't bother to say that Conrad needn't have worried, since he now no longer felt cold in the least. Nevertheless, Conrad was right - the changes in the horse were obvious. Conrad had not yet signalled their mount to go any faster, but the horse had quickened its pace anyway, and had lifted its head hopefully as if it could actually smell their home getting closer. Yuuri understood how the horse felt. Although he had stopped shivering some time ago now, he was just as eager to get home as the horse seemed to be.

"Ready?"

Yuuri nodded, and suddenly they were moving much faster. The horse seemed quite happy to respond to Conrad's signals, and in seconds had broken into a run. Yuuri looked down at the ground, watching the grass flash by. He had to look back up and keep his eyes trained on Conrad's back after a time, however, as watching the ground or even the space around him made him feel dizzy. He leaned forward just to make sure he wouldn't fall, and his head came to rest on Conrad's back. Yuuri allowed himself to remain there for a few seconds after the dizziness had past, relishing the moment. Back at the castle, he knew, Conrad would perhaps not have encouraged such physical closeness – not because he was uncomfortable with the contact, Yuuri thought, but rather because Conrad thought it better to maintain a friendly but still polite distance, just as a subordinate to a King should. Wolfram probably didn't help matters either, Yuuri mused. He had already complained more than once that Yuuri should not be doing such things as playing baseball with Conrad, maintaining that it was a waste of time and that it was improper for Yuuri to be on such familiar terms with a mere soldier. If this, then, was the last time for a while that Yuuri could be closer to Conrad than was normally dictated by custom, he decided he might as well make the most of it. So, when Conrad didn't seem to mind Yuuri using his back as a kind of support, Yuuri tentatively kept himself there. He made sure to keep his eyes wide open, though; he was sure that if he wasn't careful, he would simply fall asleep and perhaps not wake up by the time they got back.

It was in this way that Yuuri found himself blinking and realising that they were suddenly on a path that he actually recognised. He sat up with a jolt, gazing at the surroundings and attempting to make his brain start processing information again properly. He was sure he hadn't fallen asleep; time seemed to have simply slipped by without him being altogether aware of it. But there it was when he leaned over to the right to see in front of him properly: Blood Pledge Castle, not so very far ahead in the distance.

"We made it, Conrad!" His voice was hoarser than ever and his head had been throbbing for some time now - almost without him noticing - where he had previously hit it, but they were both _home_, and that was really what mattered. Remembering what Conrad had pointed out to him earlier, Yuuri looked to see how the horse was reacting. It must have been tired, but sure enough its ears had perked up, and every now and again gave a snort of what Yuuri took to be pleasure.

The rest of the trip seemed both agonizingly long but yet somehow also remarkably swift. Yuuri was excited and relieved to be back, and was certainly looking forward to getting properly dry. Still, this was one of the final moments that Conrad and he would be able to be alone together. Even playing baseball with just the two of them present, nobody was ever really alone while in the castle or its immediate grounds – it was only really an illusion of privacy, and nothing more. He hurriedly put the thought from his mind, and in all was quite happy to finally arrive back at the stables where they had originally started out from. Had it really only been a few days ago?

Yuuri had thought they would be the only ones around, and so was surprised to find a young man with a lantern waiting for them. A stable-keep, Yuuri realised by looking at the man's clothes. He must have been sleeping somewhere within the stable itself and had heard them – or possibly their horse itself - coming.

"Lord Weller, I- Heika!" The man looked slightly shocked as Conrad wearily dismounted, reaching up to help Yuuri from the horse. Yuuri felt as if his legs had somehow melded with the saddle; he still did not feel cold, but his limbs felt completely stiff and almost locked into place. He leaned on Conrad while the soldier gave swift orders which Yuuri, leaning on Conrad to keep his balance, didn't manage to catch. In a moment the man had run off, presumably to inform the castle of His Majesty's and Conrad's return ahead of the two. Which meant (and Yuuri couldn't help groaning to himself under his breath), that people would be waiting for them. He hoped nobody would make too big a fuss.

"Heika? Can you walk?"

Not Yuuri anymore, then. The Maoh decided to correct Conrad later, and concentrate on keeping his balance for now. "Of course I can", he said with slightly more confidence than he felt. He found that he could walk, and was incredibly relieved that at least he would not need to be carried over the castle threshold like some delicate maiden.

He made it all the way inside, at least.

It was, Yuuri decided later, the sudden noise which had disagreed with him more than anything else. It was the way in which everyone seemed to talk all at once, seemingly much more loudly than necessary, and thus contrasted so strongly with the long stretches of silence he had been used to while out in the forest. It was also the way in which the heat assaulted him, making him dizzy all over again. He hadn't been cold – or rather, he hadn't _felt_ cold – but the extremely abrupt heat he felt just from being inside again after days spent outdoors probably didn't help matters much, either. It even played havoc with his eyesight, so that one second Yuuri could see perfectly well, and the next his vision was growing hazy.

He had been walking just fine on his own; had not even needed Conrad's support to make it from the stables to the castle itself. In the few seconds after entering the main room, his legs had quite suddenly given way. "Sorry", he managed to mutter, just before sliding helplessly to the floor. He closed his eyes since he could not see anyway, and felt as though his head had exploded from within as the hubbub of voices grew louder. Evidently, his ears still worked perfectly well. The rest of his body was sadly unresponsive. After falling to the ground, he couldn't seem to move at all from his current position. On top of this, the room seemed suddenly devoid of air. At any rate, he was having very real trouble getting enough oxygen into his lungs.

"Yuuri! Yuuri, can you hear me?!"

He could, but managed only to shift his head very slightly in response; even his voice did not seem to want to co-operate.

"_Heika!_ Oh, Heika…!" Gunter was just as melodramatic as always.

Yuuri felt hands touch him; his shoulders, his neck, his forehead, his-

There was a collective gasp as his head was turned to one side. Yuuri couldn't think why for a moment, and then belatedly recalled the bump on his head which was now no doubt lying exposed in the bright lights of the chamber. Perhaps it looked worse than it felt, because Yuuri distinctly heard Conrad say, in wounded tones, "Heika… how could you not tell me?"

Yuuri shifted his head again in agitation, wishing he could say something but still unable to speak. And there was a huge weight on his chest, crushing him. His throat felt like it had been blocked almost completely; he knew with a terrible certainty that if he did not breathe properly soon, he would die.

Then there were more voices, and a lot more pain inside his head, and footsteps running around and echoing from all different directions. And then, finally, a gentler but firm female voice: "Good, you have it. Heika – Heika, do you hear my voice? You must try to answer, if you can." Cool fingers felt for his pulse, noting the way in which his heart raced.

His eyes stayed closed, but Yuuri, with an effort, managed to make his mouth work. "I hear you", he said, with the last of the energy and air that he could muster.

"That's good – just try to stay awake for me, Heika. Now Conrad, hold up his head for me. Everyone else, move back to give him some air. I just need to-"

He felt someone – presumably Conrad – support his head and neck. Someone fiddled with the top buttons on his shirt, and then a small hand was pressed against his chest. A tingling warmth came from it, and the pressure on his chest abruptly lessened. Yuuri found he could breathe again. The relief was short-lived as something hot and burning was poured down his throat, making him choke desperately. It nevertheless seemed to have the desired effect; his limbs came back to life in a hurry, and his back arched with the effort of getting that burning sensation out of this throat as he coughed for a moment uncontrollably. He was able to open his eyes, then, and his vision was no longer fuzzy, although it took a few seconds for his eyes to adjust to the light.

He took in the people crowded around him. Gisela's was the face he saw first, directly in front of him and holding a tiny bottle in her hand filled almost to the top with a golden-yellow liquid. Her right hand appeared to somehow glow from within; a tell-tale sign of magical powers put recently into use. Gwendal and Gunter were at either side of her; the former scowling, the latter looking worse than Yuuri felt. Wolfram stood next to Gwendal, relief warring with outrage clearly showing on his face. Yuuri couldn't see Conrad, but he felt the soldier still supporting him from behind, sitting so that Yuuri was using Conrad's knees and upper legs as a kind of pillow.

"Um… hi?"

In all, the Maoh felt that this was not his most triumphant home-coming ever.


	9. Chapter 9

**I finish essays in record-time! :D That, and I couldn't quite resist working on this chapter at the same time. There's still a lot of work that needs to be done here at home though, so there may well be another delay in getting the next chapter written and posted up. Also… I'm not exactly sure how I want to end this fic. So reviews/opinions/ideas are love!**

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The rest of the night and two more days passed, but they were mostly a blur to Yuuri. He did not think so much as feel, and each conscious moment was made up almost entirely of impressions more than anything else. Any thoughts he did have were a jumble, all mixed up in his head like mismatched puzzle pieces. It hurt to try and put them together, so he simply allowed them to be after a while, when thinking on them made him want to hide. From what, he wasn't sure. Guilt, perhaps, at making everyone worry – yet again.

He did remember slumping to the floor, and also remembered everything after that for the next little while, although he found it impossible to judge just how long after that it was for sure. He recalled his head pounding, and his chest and heart being crushed, and his throat burning. He remembered opening his eyes and his friends surrounding him, and he remembered feeling terribly, horribly embarrassed at his weakness. He remembered not seeing Conrad, but hearing his voice, the exact words. He remembered wanting to shut out those words, although they seemed to have been burned into his mind in almost the same way that the golden liquid had burned his throat. _How could you not tell me? How could you?_ The words repeated themselves, over and over again like an unwelcome mantra.

Yuuri also remembered getting up after that, and obstinately refusing to be carried to his chamber. He walked instead, with Conrad supporting him on one side and Wolfram on the other, and Yuuri gazing straight ahead because he didn't want to look at either of them (but especially Conrad), for fear of seeing a look of accusation there. He made it to his room before his head began pounding hard enough to push him off his feet again. Shortly after this he remembered almost nothing at all. One moment melded seamlessly into another; it was in this way that time passed for him.

In reality, however, time passed for everyone else agonizingly slowly. Yuuri's body, which had until now bore up remarkably well under the strain of the past few days, had finally given in to the inevitable. Conrad could only be grateful that Yuuri had held out as long as he had – had Yuuri been this unwell while in the forest, he knew that he may well have paid for it with his life. It was a strained next few days for all concerned. Other than superficial cuts and bruises, and the wound to Yuuri's head which appeared to be healing well enough, there was no physical injury. Yet Yuuri's eyes, when they were open, were unseeing and bright with fever. He swung alternatively and frequently between the extremes of temperatures; one minute he was burning up and struggling to breathe, and the next minute he shook and shuddered uncontrollably as if slowly being encased in ice. There was nothing Gisela, nor any other Healer could do, except ensure that Yuuri's condition grew no worse. It was ultimately up to Yuuri himself to get better, and so the inhabitants of Blood Pledge Castle were assigned perhaps the most difficult task of all – waiting.

Yuuri, meanwhile, tossed and turned, restless even in a state of exhaustion. He dreamed that he was still in the forest, chasing after Conrad's voice which he could never quite catch up to. He wound through the trees until he had lost all sense of direction, at which point Conrad's voice, which had been calling his name, _Yuuri, Yuuri_, disappeared entirely. Another dream that repeated itself was the crushing weight of water upon him, pinning him just below the surface of a river that refused to let him rise, until at last he was forced to breathe in and choke upon the icy liquid that eventually found its way into his lungs. More than once, too, he saw what his eyes had not been able to see before; the assassin stabbing himself unflinchingly with a knife and falling to the ground, whispering a fleeting _goodbye_ to the loved ones who passed, ghost-like, before his eyes. Yuuri cried at that, because the memory of almost losing loved ones himself – and losing one person in particular – was still vivid.

Conrad was Yuuri's bedside often, although absent on their first night back. Once the Maoh had been taken care of, Gwendal had taken one look at his stubborn half-brother and more or less ordered him to rest. Outwardly, Conrad looked just as controlled and composed as ever. Gwendal had not been fooled, and Conrad had been tired enough to be able to sleep for an hour or two despite his worry. Wolfram (with a little persuasion from Gwendal), had withheld his anger at Conrad and had agreed to wait for a more appropriate time to display it. For now, he made do with glaring at Conrad whenever he happened to pass him in the hallways, and remaining utterly silent in Conrad's presence otherwise. Conrad accepted the treatment without protest, unsurprised and even welcoming Wolfram's manner. He _should_ feel guilty, he knew. If it had been anyone other than Yuuri, he would probably have dismissed himself (or been dismissed) from service as a fitting form of punishment for his failings.

But he had made a promise, and so for much of the time that followed could be found in Yuuri's chambers, dealing as best as he could with the guilt clawing at him which made it hard to even look at Yuuri's too-pale face without wanting to run from it, knowing that he had been the cause. On one occasion he did leave the room, completely unable to stand the sight of Yuuri crying soundlessly in his sleep. If Conrad got up a little too abruptly, if he walked from the room a little too quickly and without so much as a fabricated excuse, neither Gisela nor Gwendal, both of whom happened to be present at the time, made comment. Certainly Gwendal himself had enough to deal with between keeping Wolfram in check and attempting to stop Gunter from going over the deep end. Gisela's eyes were, as always when she worked, free from judgement.

Outside the castle, the rain which had been falling steadily ever since the Maoh's return continued to pour. Yuuri woke up three full days after he had given into sleep, still tired and aching and with pounding head. He had no idea how much time had passed since his last proper memory of first arriving back, but, turning his head and seeing Conrad asleep beside him, he judged it had been a while.

Yuuri had never seen Conrad look so tired before. Always, Conrad had kept a proper sense of decorum whenever he was around Yuuri; Yuuri had never seen Conrad so much as yawn while he was around. But Conrad slept now, with his clothing still on and rumpled, half-sitting in a chair right beside Yuuri's bed. At some point – probably after falling asleep – he had leaned forward so that his head and arms were resting on Yuuri's bed, in much the same way as Yuuri himself had fallen asleep sometimes at the desk in his study. It was too dark in the room to see Conrad's face in detail – it must be either very late at night or very early morning, Yuuri decided – but he was sure he could make out the shadows under Conrad's eyes even so. His head pounded even harder with the knowledge that he had, once again, messed things up spectacularly and this time had managed to mix Conrad up in the middle of it. Would he never be able to do anything of consequence without making others pay the price for his mistakes?

The rain kept rhythm with Yuuri's head, and he rolled over onto his side to try and ease the pressure. Only now he was lying at eye-level with Conrad, and his sense of guilt certainly didn't seem to be going anywhere. Neither was the headache, or the heavy, almost painful feeling that grew in the pit of his stomach and began making its way into his chest and throat. He didn't think he had enough energy or air to speak Conrad's name (and he wasn't even sure that he wanted to), but the overwhelming urge to _touch_ him – just to make sure that this wasn't a dream and that Conrad was really here, right in front of him – was far too great to let Yuuri just lie there, unmoving. If he didn't touch him now, Conrad might just disappear again-

It took a lot of effort, far more than he felt it should have, just to lift him arm out from under the covers of the bed. His face felt too warm as he slowly guided his arm (or else, his arm guided him), to brush a lock of stray hair from Conrad's face.

He hadn't banked on Conrad actually waking up.

The soldier awoke with a start, leaping to his feet and automatically reaching for a sword that wasn't there. Yuuri whipped his hand back to the bed, feeling somehow afraid that he had done something he should not have. If he had been a few years younger, he would have given into the impulse that told him to hide under the covers. Only the sight of Conrad now looking down at him with an expression of – of _something_ – made Yuuri stay put, paralyzed. He stared up at Conrad, speechless.

Conrad, for once, seemed just at a loss for words as Yuuri did. After a few seconds of stunned silence, he did the only thing he felt capable of doing, and moved to check Yuuri's temperature. He saw Yuuri's eyes flutter closed as Conrad's hand came to rest, very gently, on his forehead. The soldier frowned as he noticed the signs of sickness still lingering; the fever was evidently still there, yet Yuuri was trembling slightly under the heap of blankets that covered him. Moving his fingers to the side of Yuuri's neck, Conrad took note also at the speed of which Yuuri's pulse raced.

"Heika?"

Yuuri kept his eyes stubbornly closed, and Conrad sighed.

"Yuuri?"

The Maoh opened his eyes, black as night, to look back up at Conrad. "Yes?" It was all he could say. He found he could not keep his voice from shaking.

"Are you alright?"

"…I don't know." It was as truthful an answer as Yuuri could give. He didn't know how he felt, or why he felt it. But the pounding at his temple wouldn't let up, and when his eyes closed again it was because he didn't seem to have much of a choice. Deprived of sight, he reached out again for Conrad, terrified that he wouldn't find him. But a strong hand found his, and grasped it reassuringly. "My head-", began Yuuri, and then was suddenly overcome by a fit of coughing. When Conrad made to get up in order to find help, he found his hand still in the desperate grip of Yuuri's, who held Conrad's hand like his life depended on it. "No!", Yuuri managed to say between coughs and his mind slipping away again. "Don't- don't go. I won't be able to find you again-!"

"Yuuri, it's fine, we're safe, we're not in the forest anymore-"

"_NO!_"

Yuuri refused to let go; he thrashed about in the bed, wasting what little energy he had left in him, and Conrad couldn't tell if Yuuri could even hear him now or not. He yelled out for Gisela, although Yuuri had probably already alerted someone with the amount of noise he was making. Conrad was still trying to get through to him when the door finally burst open. And all the while – from the time Gisela, with Gwendal's help, had managed to calm Yuuri down and stop his coughing, and then once more made Yuuri swallow something that Gisela promised would allow Yuuri to sleep again more peacefully – Yuuri had not let go of Conrad's hand, and nor had Conrad tried to make him.

Whatever Gisela had managed to make Yuuri swallow worked quickly; Yuuri's movements slowed as his limbs grew heavy, and his head lolled back onto the pillow. Conrad was exceedingly glad that Wolfram had not been there, and grateful also that Gwendal had, once again, refrained from comment – after all, hadn't this whole affair started when Yuuri jad thought Conrad was leaving?

Gwendal and Gisela retired back to their respective rooms once it was obvious that the medicine given to Yuuri had taken full effect, leaving Conrad, at his own insistence, to finish off his watch for the night. It was still three hours until daybreak, but Conrad's mind was too filled with a confusing jumble of emotions to allow him to gain any more rest. He resigned himself to his fate, and tried to re-settle himself as he watched Yuuri sleep. Even with the drug at work, Yuuri still dreamed; Conrad saw his eyes moving around under closed lids, and once heard him murmur something unintelligible, although the panic in his voice was unmistakable.

In the end, Conrad simply sat and waited for the dawn, not letting go of Yuuri's hand.


	10. Chapter 10

**I edited this chapter numerous times after writing it, and I'm still not sure about it now. On the one hand, ****I thoroughly enjoyed writing it, even if I ended up going back and getting all nit-picky with each and every word (particularly within the last few paragraphs). On the other hand, there's not much actually happening. Or rather, there is, but it's mostly internal rather than external action, so I'm slightly worried that this chapter will come across as – dare I say it – slightly boring. Perhaps it could be regarded as an interlude of sorts, although I still think it's important to the actual story… Okay, I'll shut up now and post this damn thing before I'm tempted to go back for another edit. Hope you enjoy. **

* * *

When Yuuri next gained full consciousness, some way in which the way the world felt around him made him think that it might be late afternoon, perhaps on the cusp of evening. His arms, legs, even head, seemed heavy and sluggish without even an attempt to move them, so for a few moments he simply lay completely still, letting his ears adjust to the environment. He kept his eyes closed, letting only sound filter through into a mind which seemed to move just as slowly and gradually as his muscles might have done had he tried them out, so it was a while before the sounds Yuuri heard translated themselves into any real thought.

The subtle, outside noises were registered first rather than the louder and more immediate ones. There were birds singing their final songs for the day, and somewhere there were the distinct sounds of horse hooves. Closer to home, there were the squeaks and slams of doors opening and closing, and the hushed talk of voices – high-pitched, female, blending in with the footsteps which echoed somewhere along a hallway.

Turning his attention to his nearer surroundings, Yuuri became aware of a breathing besides his own. It was coming from his right, and sounded soft and even. Gentle. _Safe_, his mind told him, and he opened his eyes, unafraid.

Gisela sat on a chair, her own eyes closed. There was something about the way she sat – straight and upright – which made Yuuri think that she was not sleeping. Although he himself felt decidedly drowsy, despite also feeling curiously hyper-sensitive, he decided he would try out his voice to see whether or not any sound came out.

"Gisela?" he said, very quietly. Though a little husky, there appeared to be at least nothing wrong with the sound.

Gisela opened her eyes quickly and stood, staring at Yuuri with a strange mixture of puzzlement, caution and delight. "Heika! You're awake! …How do you feel?" Her tone was just a little apprehensive, Yuuri mused, as if she expected some kind of negative reaction.

"Um… okay, I think", replied Yuuri after a moment's consideration. "A little… heavy?"

Gisela nodded. "The drug hasn't worked its way out of your system just yet. Truthfully, I didn't expect you to be awake so soon – I thought you would sleep another few hours yet, maybe even another full day."

"Drug… I don't remember."

"You were awake but not properly aware at the time, Heika. You were… a little distraught. I hope you will forgive me for not gaining your permission, but I would not have administered anything had I thought it unnecessary."

Yuuri let her words sink in and spread, one by one like pebbles dropping into a pool and sending ripples of thought lapping gently within his mind. "It's okay", he said eventually. "You did what you thought was best." He couldn't say the idea of being drugged appealed to him, but it did at least account for the way in which everything seemed to move so very slowly, and he was sure Gisela knew what she was doing; she had always appeared to him to be a very capable figure.

Now she was checking his temperature, feeling his pulse, peering into his eyes, making him squeeze her hand as hard as he could, asking him simple questions ("what colour are my eyes, Heika? How many fingers am I holding up? What is the date of your birth? Your Mother's name?"). Yuuri answered them all patiently, although it sometimes seemed to take a while for his thoughts to make their way to his mouth. Gisela seemed satisfied enough, however, and eventually stood back, pleased with the progress.

"You seem well enough. The others will be glad – you had them worried."

"I… I did? I didn't mean to." The thought saddened him; he hated to make people worry. What had he done to make them worry? Dimly, as if he had dreamed it, he recalled voices, faces to match them. A vague remembrance of shouting – his shouting? Yuuri shook his head, confused, and Gisela hastened to reassure him.

"It would be best for you to rest, Heika; please don't make tire yourself if it can be helped. Your body is still mending, and any strain too soon will have adverse effects."

"Oh. Did I break something?"

"No. But you ran a high fever, and your physical exhaustion meant that you spent a lot of energy – both physical and magical – to help you recover. You need time to regain your strength- Heika?"

"…M'okay", Yuuri said, eyes closed again and his words coming out a little slurred. "Just sleepy all of a sudden."

"Then please sleep. Your body knows what is best."

"Can I see them? I don't want them to keep worrying. I didn't mean to… so please tell them…" His voice grew fainter until it disappeared altogether, and Gisela checked his breathing once more before leaving the room to break the news. The fever had broken - His Majesty still needed rest, but appeared lucid.

Time passed – seconds, hours, or both. Voices filtered through Yuuri's consciousness like the final rays of sunlight on his face. Somewhere in the recesses of his mind, he paired the voices and his memory of the faces together, so that what he heard (or perhaps dreamed he heard), was coupled with an image of each speaker in turn.

"_He is the very picture of nobility! Oh, Hiiiieeeka!"_

"_Keep it down. She said let him sleep."_

"_If he wakes up I'll drug him again myself. Stupid wimp – doesn't even know when he needs sleep..."_

"_Are you crying? Oh, such a moving display of emotion, my darling Wolf!"_

"_NO I AM NOT!"_

"_Quiet! Let him have his peace, or I will drag you from the room myself."_

He recognised all the voices, matching them up with the right faces with no difficulty. But… but wait- _missing_, his mind warned him. _Missing. There's someone missing._ But who, and why were they missing, and why was it so important that he find them? He frowned, suddenly troubled. Without the voice, his lethargic state prevented him from picturing the face that should go with it. But, _missing_, his mind repeated, and he shifted in his half-aware state, unaccountably restless.

"_See, I thought you were being too noisy-"_

"_It wasn't me, it was him!"_

"_Certainly not – you should go if you can't control the volume of your voice."_

"_No way, I'm the one who should be here the most – you should go!"_

"_Enough. We will all go. Yes, including you, Wolfram. No arguments."_

Retreating footsteps, and the urgent call in his mind unfulfilled. _Missing! Find him!_ And it came to him, then, with a suddenness that took his breath away. Through a kind of haze, Yuuri managed to whisper: "_No_."

And then – Yuuri was sure it must be a dream now, because of the sheer relief that radiated through him as soon as he felt the touch on his face, brushing the hair back from his forehead and then reaching down to rest lightly on his hand – Conrad was there, and everything fell into its proper place. Even if the uneasy feeling of guilt lurked somewhere at the edges of his mind, even if there was a tiny spark of apprehension that this touch might go away again, it was enough that the touch, and the face and voice that he knew went with it, was here with him now. So Yuuri allowed himself to relax again, basking in the feeling of warmth that the touch gave him. _Conrad_, his mind confirmed.

The other voices seemed far away now, although still just loud enough for him to make out the words. _"Hey, how come he gets to stay?"_

"_Because he was the only one __among us to hold his tongue. Now move."_

"_Oh, but my precious Heika!-"_

"_He's not going anywhere, Gunter."_

"_And neither am I!"_

"_Think again, Wolfram."_

"_How wonderful! True love shines through even now!"_

"_Mother!"_

"_Watch over him well, Conrart."_

Somewhere, miles away, a door shut. The hand on top of Yuuri's own didn't move. Neither did Yuuri; not until everything had gone quiet and still again. He fought to stay awake – he did not want to go back to sleep. Not yet.

"Conrad?"

A pause, a slight twitch of the hand. Still, Conrad, ever the master of self-control, managed somehow to sound unsurprised. "Heika. You should be sleeping."

"I know. But I don't want to. I wanted… I just…"

Conrad was instantly on guard at the hesitation in Yuuri's voice. He would not allow for Yuuri to become anxious – not again - and so he tried to make his voice sound as calming as possible when he next spoke. "I'll be here when you next wake up, Heika. I swear it."

"Please don't call me that", Yuuri whispered. Above all, he could not bear the thought of Conrad being distant.

"Yuuri. You must rest."

"I will. But I want to apologise first." He opened his eyes, prepared now for the sight that greeted him. He wished he could make Conrad smile.

"There's no need, Yuuri. I'm the one who should be-"

"No! No, you're not. Or if you are, then I should be apologising more. I messed things up. And then I made you worry, just like I always do."

"It wasn't your fault."

"It was. And you're going to blame yourself, because that's who you are – you probably already have blamed yourself, even though it wasn't- even though I-" To his horror, he heard his voice growing thick with tears. He blinked, doing his best to hold them back.

Conrad's grip on Yuuri's hand tightened instinctively. "I fear you know me too well, Yuuri." And perhaps he did, the soldier thought. He _did_ blame himself, and Yuuri knew that he did. "But nonetheless", he continued, making sure to keep his voice soft, "it isn't your fault. You mustn't believe it is."

"Then do _you_ still believe it's your fault, about what happened?" Conrad was silent, and Yuuri closed his eyes wearily. It was hard to exercise control when he was so tired, and he felt weakened from the effects the drug still had on him. His eyes itched as he looked up at Conrad again. "You won't lie to me. That's why you don't say anything."

Conrad bowed his head, unable to deny it. "Forgive me, Heika."

"There's nothing to forgive. Not on your account. But I…" He trailed off, blinked again, and paused to take a deep breath. "A man died a little while ago. He might not have been a King, but he had a family who he cared for very much, and a family who in turn cared for him. Why should one life be more important than another? I don't believe his life was any less… sacred, than mine, or anybody else's. I don't believe one life can be compared to another in value. But just like that, he died anyway. And he wouldn't have done, but for me. Am I wrong?"

"He made a choice. You did not kill him." Conrad's voice was as firm as Yuuri's was not.

"No. I didn't kill him. But you can't say I wasn't involved. You can't say I didn't… and now I'm going to cry, even though I'm trying not to. And you'll feel even worse, just because I couldn't… just because I couldn't stop myself from…" His voice finally broke on the final words, and he found he was unable to suppress it any longer. "I'm sorry, Conrad- I'm so sorry!"

He shielded his face with his arm, and would not look at Conrad again as he wept. Conrad himself could only watch in dismay, powerless. Yet even in that moment, he saw that Yuuri did not look like a boy crying. He did not look weak, or undignified, or childish in the least. Rather, Yuuri cried restrainedly, but let his tears fall where they would instead of wiping them away as they fell. Yuuri was not ashamed of crying, Conrad realised, but rather felt guilt and remorse for it purely because he knew that Conrad himself would be affected by it.

And so Conrad did the only thing he knew he could do at that moment, and kept hold of Yuuri's other hand until the Maoh had fully exhausted his tears – until his muffled sobs had softened further into infrequent sniffles, until his arm gradually dropped from his face to lie limply back at his side; until he had finally cried himself very quietly to sleep.


	11. Chapter 11

**The final chapter! It was by far the hardest to write out of them ****all (which is why it took so long to be posted online compared to previous chapters). But I hope it flows okay anyway and that everyone still enjoys the read. When I get around to it, I may well post a sort of mini-chapter as a kind of epilogue.**

* * *

Wolfram's snores were filling the room when Yuuri woke again. The fiery blonde looked as peaceful as usual in sleep, his limbs sprawled out as far as the chair would let him – fleetingly, Yuuri wondered if Wolfram had the tendency to sleep so deeply because he was so constantly passionate when he was awake. Perhaps the nights made up for the days where Wolfram seemed to exude twice the amount of energy than anyone else regardless of the activity, be it painting or practicing with the sword.

Yuuri blinked, realising now that things appeared to feel relatively normal, physically speaking. His limbs were no longer heavy and seemed responsive enough, and his mind no longer felt bogged down, but instead felt clear and fresh. Experimentally, he wriggled his fingers and toes. When he felt no ill effects, he stretched, feeling his body tingling and fully aware once more. He inhaled deeply, relishing the air that moved in and out of his body unhindered. His throat felt a little raw, but other than this Yuuri felt remarkably well. Better than he had felt in a long time, in fact. Refreshed somehow; as if something unnecessary had been burned away or purged at some point within the past few days.

Deciding he might as well put this new-found feeling of strength to the test, he pushed aside the blankets that suddenly seemed a little smothering, and got out of the bed. He took his time, his thoughts quite calm. _No rush_, they said. And he didn't want to wake Wolfram; he wanted to savour this quiet, this peace. He wanted to allow himself this sensation of freedom a while longer, and to let his feet lead him where they may. He wanted to remain unfettered by everything that was a part of everyday life: paperwork, politics, the duties of a Maoh. In this moment, he sensed, he could truly be himself, and would not need to return to the realities of life until the sky lightened outside his window, or until he chose to – whichever came first. And, judging by the general atmosphere – the universal hush that seemed to hover over the castle like a blanket – it was still very early morning, not yet dawn.

So he tiptoed across the floor, marvelling at the touch of cool, solid stone beneath his bare feet after so many days of lying down. Wolfram snored on as Yuuri quietly opened the door and exited the room, smiling at the sight of the empty corridor that greeted him. He heard the distinct sound of guards approaching from his right, so he turned and walked in the opposite direction. _Fresh air_, he decided, and headed for the nearest balcony.

The air was all but still, and it suited Yuuri's mood well. It would be a clear day, he decided, looking out into the still semi-darkness and sniffing the air for traces of rain. He was sure he was not sick anymore, yet some sort of hypersensitivity still remained. His senses all felt inexplicably heightened; the stone surface of the floor continued to tingle beneath his feet, his ears picked up sounds from all around, and he felt somehow connected to the very earth itself – as if he could literally _feel_ the earth breathing, inhaling and exhaling just as clearly as he himself did now. Energy seemed to spark in the air around him; he could almost see it with his own eyes. He wondered, briefly, if this sensation was an after-effect of the drug that Gisela had given to him, or if it could be some kind of after-effect from the healing magic itself, but just as quickly put the thought from his mind. Whatever this was, it did not feel wrong, or dangerous, or artificial. The feeling was a little odd, and more than a little unfamiliar. But if anything, it felt very right. And even just to stand here and have a minute or two to himself in this land which he had come to think of as a second home… that felt wondrous indeed.

"…But _grave-digging_? That's a new low, even for you."

The sounds of approaching footsteps were heard only a second after the voices were. Yuuri knew even before the second person replied who would be by Josak's side.

"It couldn't be helped. You were the only one I wholly trusted for the job who had the necessary skills as well." Conrad's voice was apologetic, but serious.

"You flatter me, Captain. You can't possibly tell me you didn't come to your own conclusions."

"Of course I did. But I value your opinion. There's nobody that's travelled as… widely, as you have. Out of everyone, you have the most experience in these matters."

"Very diplomatic of you, Captain." Even though Yuuri could not yet see either of them, he knew Josak would have that teasing grin on his face; the one that told Conrad to lighten up, that Josak was only making fun.

The sound of their footsteps, light on the floor's surface despite the heavy-duty footwear, came closer. In a moment they would round another corner and would see Yuuri standing there. At any other time, he supposed he would have hidden somewhere to listen in to the conversation, or perhaps would have even ran in the opposite direction to question Conrad on the matter at a later time. Now, he stood still and continued to breathe calmly, waiting. Even if their conversation was considered privileged information, he knew that he was entitled to hear it. He was no child anymore, that he needed to be protected from the truth. And, _the Maoh should not run from his duties_, his head reminded him. _He should listen to whatever his retainers had to say, and then make fully-informed decisions from the information he has been given_. Yuuri was not exactly sure when his mind had begun to sound so damn logical, but the silent voice was definitely his, albeit a side of him that he was as yet mostly unfamiliar with. It felt like something had awoken inside of him, which he had perhaps always been aware of but that had until very recently remained dormant.

So he turned his head and greeted Conrad and Josak with a smile and no trace of a blush on his face, knowing that they knew he must have overheard them.

"Yo, kiddo. Feeling better already?" Josak was irreverent as always. His casualness was welcomed by Yuuri, who felt that formal language should at least be reserved for more ceremonial occasions.

"Yes, thank you, Josak", he replied, unable to keep from answering the grin with one of his own. "I'm feeling much better. Though I'm sure everyone'll make a big deal out of it and tell me to take it easy, so can you keep it quiet that I'm out of bed? They'll find out eventually, but if I didn't get out I would've gone crazy in there." He didn't miss the glance that passed from Josak to Conrad and back again as he spoke. Concern, maybe?

Josak gave a slight shrug in Conrad's direction before turning back to Yuuri. "Then if anyone asks, I haven't seen you at all this morning", he said, winking. "You might have a bit more trouble convincing Weller-kyo here to back us up on that, though."

Yuuri stared past Josak at Conrad, who stood a little behind his friend, his face partially obscured in shadow. Yuuri couldn't tell Conrad's expression or what he might be thinking by looking at him, but Josak evidently knew something of what was going through Conrad's mind. He gave Conrad a playful little shove in Yuuri's direction, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Well, I can see these negotiations are going to take a while, so I'll leave you two to it. Weller-kyo. Heika." Josak gave a slight bow and gripped Conrad's shoulder for an instant before walking back the way he had came, leaving Conrad and Yuuri alone on the balcony.

Conrad came to stand beside Yuuri, looking out as Yuuri did at the outside world. They did not speak for a minute, but simply stood in peaceful quiet. Stealing a glimpse at Conrad, Yuuri saw that the soldier looked still and calm, his face serene and seemingly at ease. Nonetheless, Yuuri was sure he detected an undercurrent of strong feeling bubbling underneath the composure. Something about the way Conrad stood, his shoulders just a little stiff, gave him away. Yuuri would once have not noticed. Now, with a flash of insight, he understood that Conrad was tense about something, and that this something more than likely involved Yuuri himself. He thought he knew what it was.

"You still feel guilty about it." It wasn't a question.

"I do."

"Why? You did everything you could. And it turned out okay."

Conrad's expression did not change. "This time, it did. But it doesn't change the fact that I was responsible for your welfare, and failed to keep you safe."

"What more could you have done? You can't control everything, and I'm the one who made the decision to go anyway. You've already forgiven me for that, yet you haven't forgiven yourself for it. That doesn't seem fair."

"Heika… Yuuri", Conrad amended, seeing Yuuri's silent reproach. "It's not always that easy."

Yuuri sighed, resting his arms on the rail in front of him. "I know it, Conrad. But you can't feel guilty for every little thing. Otherwise you'd never get anywhere. And if anything, _I'm_ the one who should feel responsible for _your_ safety. That's kind of my job, after all, isn't it? To be responsible for my kingdom and for my subjects who live in it?"

"As it is my job to be responsible for you."

"And you're not one of my subjects?"

Conrad looked at Yuuri properly then, seeing his face fully in the gradually lightening day. As usual, Yuuri wore his heart on his sleeve and let his emotions show just as they were. He saw slight exasperation on his King's face, and a little teasing humour. And underneath that, Conrad knew Yuuri was dead serious, as well as stubborn. He would not drop the subject until he was satisfied that Conrad's guilt had lessened; of this, Conrad was certain.

Then Yuuri looked at him, somehow both solemn and smiling at the same time. "Are you reading me, Conrad?" There was something in his voice that Conrad was unaccustomed to. There was a hint of a challenge underneath those words. It was difficult to see because of the shadows, but Conrad thought he might have just caught a glimpse of a shift in the shape of Yuuri's eyes, and a very slight lengthening of his hair.

But the sun was rising quickly now, and before Conrad could be sure, a small beam of sunlight had struck Yuuri's face. Rather than turn away, Yuuri simply closed his eyes, letting the sun warm him. He had changed somehow. The thought came to Conrad in a rush, powerful in its truthfulness. Yes, Yuuri _had_ changed. Not in terms of personality, or in physical appearance. Yuuri's hair was as dark as ever, his skin lightly tanned and glowing faintly in the sun. He had not grown any taller, either – at least, not noticeably. But there was nevertheless something present that had not been there earlier. A new-found self-assurance, perhaps, or a kind of self-possession. It told Conrad that Yuuri had somehow, within the space of the last day or so, grown within himself. Possibly even magically as well, Conrad noted. He knew little about these sorts of things, but his senses did not lie. He could see the air particles which danced and darted about Yuuri's body, making up a kind of almost-visible aura. Yuuri was still clad in the old pair of blue pyjamas which were a size too big for him, making him seem even smaller by comparison. Yet there was very little that seemed child-like about the Maoh at this point. Some indefinable thing had been put aside, to be replaced by something else entirely. Whether this had been a conscious decision or not, it filled Conrad almost with a kind of awe.

And when Yuuri opened his eyes again and smiled that open-hearted smile, Conrad knew he could never refuse him. "It seems I have no choice", he said out loud.

Yuuri frowned a little, confused. "What do you mean?"

Conrad only shook his head. "Nothing, Heika."

Yuuri didn't really understand, but Conrad's shoulders had relaxed, the tension finally eased, and this was something which Yuuri understood well enough. "Is it okay?" he asked, and Conrad nodded.

"Perhaps we have both learned a few things from this", he replied.

The quiet spell of earliest morning was in the midst of breaking as they spoke. Clatters were heard from the kitchen; a bird called from somewhere in a tree nearby, and was answered by a neighbour. Dawn had suddenly burst forth in the blink of an eyelid. The sun had risen fully over the crest of the hill that had hidden it up until now, and the light of it cast back the last lingering shadows of the night.

Yuuri lifted his arms from where they had been supported by the rail, and stood up straight. "Good morning, Conrad", he said. And for one flicker of an instant as the light washed over him, he truly was the sun.

Conrad smiled properly for the first time since Yuuri had arrived back in Shin Makoku. "Good morning, Yuuri."


	12. Epilogue

Yuuri took aim and threw the baseball; it flew in a graceful arc towards Conrad, who caught it squarely in his mitt and tried not to look too surprised at the strength of which it had landed. Perhaps Yuuri had grown physically as well as inwardly, after all.

"Do you think I'm making the right decision, Conrad?"

"I do", the soldier replied, readying himself to throw the ball back to Yuuri.

"Wolfram doesn't think so", Yuuri said doubtfully, keeping his eye on the ball. "Neither does Gwendal."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that, Heika. Gwendal simply isn't used to… ah, taking the passive approach in these matters, that's all." He threw the ball, watching Yuuri take a few steps back to compensate for Conrad's longer throw.

Ball safely in hand, Yuuri shrugged, raising his voice slightly now that he stood further away. "I just think that there's not enough proof. Even if the assassin did look like he was from Big Shimaron, there's no way to tell for sure. And even if we assume he definitely was, there's still no evidence to prove he received his orders from there. He could have been born in Big Shimaron and travelled away. Or his parents could have been from Big Shimaron and the assassin might never have set foot there in his life. It's not enough to declare war over if I wanted to. And I don't."

"I agree", Conrad replied, and caught the next throw which came just as hard as the last. Yes, there was definitely more force in that arm than there had been, he mused. It had been nearly a month since what had been become being referred to as 'the incident', and Yuuri had made a swift recovery since the morning on the balcony. Conrad had not spoken of it to anyone. Josak had wisely kept his mouth shut, knowing instinctively that Conrad preferred to keep whatever had gone on between he and Yuuri and private. It seemed that Yuuri had not seen fit to enlighten anyone else on the matter either, which Conrad had been grateful for. The few minutes snatched between them had somehow been a moment of deep intimacy; something which both of them instinctively understood without having to explain to the other.

Yuuri, for his part, had discovered that the feeling he had woken up with on that day which now seemed so long ago (but which was nonetheless etched into his memory with a vivid and almost unreal clarity), had not gone away as he had predicted. If anything, the feeling of… whatever it was, had increased. Sometimes it lay in the shadows of his awareness, lurking there like some hidden facet of a more powerful self. Other times he might speak and hear it in his voice, completely unintentionally. At these times, he felt almost embarrassed at the way in which the guards would snap to attention, or in the way that Gunter's eyes would widen and grow watery-eyed in wonder and admiration, or even in the way Wolfram would refrain from calling him 'wimp' for the whole of the rest of the day.

Yuuri felt embarrassed, too, at the very nameable feeling that he sometimes awoke in the mornings with. Dreams hovered on the edges of his consciousness at these times, half-remembered and half-repressed for fear that they were somehow wrong (and also for fear that Wolfram might read his mind and discover why Yuuri had become so much more eager to get out of bed a while before Wolfram did each morning). Sometimes he grew restless, and prowled the castle at night while waiting for his mind to catch up with his body so that he could sleep. At these times, Conrad (who was far from oblivious about such matters, for all his silence on the subject), seemed to know without asking when Yuuri wanted company and when he wished to be left alone to think in relative privacy.

Conrad watched Yuuri now, taking his time in tossing the ball back. It was, he mused, a difficult and somewhat awkward age to be for Yuuri, who was clearly old enough to know what he wanted, but not experienced or quite self-assured enough to know how to go about getting it. Numerous times - particularly on the nights when he shadowed Yuuri's footsteps through the more or less empty corridors and silent hallways – he had thought about saying something. Just to give Yuuri a gentle nudge in the desired direction. But always, he had pulled himself back. Better, Conrad had decided, for Yuuri to make up his mind in his own time, and learn to approach things in his own way and on his own terms. Conrad could wait. He had gained a lot of practice.

"Catch, Yuuri!"

He arched his arm back and threw, knowing he would not have to hold back, trusting that Yuuri could now catch whatever was thrown at him. The sun beat down on both of them, making them sweat lightly beneath their respective uniforms. Yuuri stretched out his arm and jumped to catch the ball in mid-air, and Conrad allowed himself the freedom of an unrestrained smile in answer to Yuuri's grin of pure pleasure at time together, uncomplicated.

Time still, plenty of time, for Yuuri to grow just that little bit more. Conrad would wait. He was good at waiting.

And perhaps, perhaps, in any case…

"Here it comes, Conrad!"

… Perhaps it would not be such a long wait after all.


End file.
